These Stories About Seeing Porn For The First Time Are Way Too Relatable

Photographed by Michael Beckert.
It's safe to assume that most people's first experiences with porn are less meaningful than their first experiences with sex. That said, they're almost guaranteed to be funnier.
Everyone has a different story about how they came across their first porno (maybe they were snooping around someone else's stuff or "innocently" searching for something online). But, no matter what route we took to enter the world of pornography, we probably were not entirely prepared for what we found.
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From shame to arousal to flat-out confusion, people's initial reactions to porn are wide, ranging, and often involuntary. Think back to the first time you watched, read, or viewed something NSFW. We weren't there, but we're willing to bet you're blushing just recalling it.
Ahead, we've rounded up some of our favorite stories about first-time porn experiences from Reddit and the R29 community. Read on for some seriously hilarious (and cringeworthy) anecdotes — and share your own in the comments if you dare.
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I really liked it.

"My first time was completely by accident. I was in fifth grade and I was at a sleepover at a friend's house, just the two of us, and her mom had bought Flubber on Pay-Per-View for us. I must have watched it three or four times because I always had a hard time sleeping at other people's houses. But by the early hours of the morning, Flubber was no longer playing, and a soft-core porno came on. I remember it was about some ancient Greek brothel with a pool, and the women were half naked. I was so nervous someone would walk in because it was also the first time I really felt turned on by something. There were other movies on after that first one, but I didn't want to get out of my sleeping bag and turn the TV off I was so embarrassed. I remember being still awake and hearing my friends mom come in mortified and hurriedly turned the TV off, thinking I was asleep in my sleeping bag. I didn't watch porn for a long time after that, but I knew that night that I really liked it."

-Sarah
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I'm going to be in so much trouble.

"[My first thoughts were]: What is this? Ahh! She's naked! Close window. Oh god, what if my parents discover that I saw that? Is it in the Recent Sites thing? It's in the Recent Sites thing! I'm going to be in so much trouble. What do I do? I know! The browser only remembers the names of the last 20 sites I browsed. So I just have to look at a bunch of different sites to overwrite the Recent Sites thing. Quick, open up Dinotopia.com and look at a bunch of stuff.

"And that became my routine for looking at porn until I got my own computer: look at porn, then look at dinosaurs until all the Recent Sites were dinosaur-related so that no one would ever know I looked at porn. The day I discovered 'Delete Browser History' was very momentous."

-Reddit user iwishiwasamoose
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It looked like it hurt like hell.

"I saw one video when I was 17. I only remember that it looked like it hurt like hell, and that any woman who wanted to have sex had to be crazy. Then I discovered erotic lit in college, which made everything better."

-Account has been deleted
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I loaded up the computer with viruses.

"I first saw porn when I was in middle school (11 or 12). I had just learned about the reproductive systems and sex and decided that typing 'naked.com' into the address bar was a good idea. I did this for a couple weeks until I loaded up the computer with viruses, and my parents discovered it and told me that that kind of stuff is for adults only."

-Reddit user KTcube
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I was like, 'No way that's real.'

"It was odd. I saw the guy's dong and I was like, No way that's real."

-Reddit user A_Hospital_with_wifi
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We took turns watching the movie and whacking off.

"I was like 12. I went to my friend's cottage; his mom's boyfriend at the time was a Hell's Angel, really cool guy. While they went to town for groceries and stuff, we were going through his things and found a stack of VHS tapes with no tags. Popped one in, and it was porn. My friend had already started beating it on a regular basis, so we took turns watching the movie and whacking off. After a few pumps, I blew a tiny load, used a stray sock to clean it up. The guy found out we had gone through his stash, took us aside, laughed, and then gave us a VHS each. My friend got one with Ron Jeremy, I got some gangbang movie."

-Reddit user DallasDriller
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I wanted to be cool.

"I wanted to be cool.
"I wanted to wakeboard like the cool kids.
"So I looked up 'watersports.'"

-Reddit user koproller
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Speaking of NSFW topics, we want to hear your unfiltered opinions about the 69 sex position — whether you hate it, love it, or don't get the hype around it. Click on the image to take our quick survey.
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