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We do a lot of online shopping during the day (what — it's for work), so believe us when we say that we've seen it all. Frowning sweaters. "Ghetto" shoes. Whatever this thing is. If they sell it online, and you can wear it, we've clicked on it. However, this offering (pictured at right) on Pixie Market gave us a rare moment of pause.
Seeing the dress for what it is takes you on quite the mental journey. At first glance, you admire how nice it is to see something strapless styled over an oxford (you've been championing this styling trick since you first saw it at the fall shows in February). However, then you realize that — whoops — the model must have accidentally pulled down her dress a little too far. After all, that sweetheart bodice is obviously not meant to lift and separate your belly. That'd just be silly. However, then you notice that the dress is in fact way too short to fit anything larger than an average 5-year-old…and 5-year-olds don't wear strapless dresses. Nope — that sagging top area isn't actually because there aren't any boobs to fill them up, and that tapered middle isn't because it's supposed to sit at your waist, and the length is the length because it's a skirt, not a dress. Skirt. Not dress. Skirt. Skirt.
Feel free to order an additional cocktail during dinner tonight. You deserve it.
One of the most fun parts about
shaking up your style is discovering new perspectives. And, if you
already feel like you’ve spent a little too much time at your local boutique —
they know your denim size and your
full dating history — we’re here to bring you foreign inspiration, no plane
ticket nor vacation read
What kind of Instagram follower are you? Are you someone whose feed is filled with endless model selfies and front-row runway shots? Or, are you prone to tons of food pics from all the chefs, restaurants, and bloggers that make you hungry at any moment's notice? Or, are you all about the artistic value of the read