In the months leading up to my wedding, I started to obsess about everything. All I wanted was to feel beautiful and calm walking down the aisle, but my actions suggested everything but. I felt fat and couldn’t stop thinking about how big my ass would look from behind while saying my vows; I went on an insane crash diet-slash-cleanse. I was exhausted — yet I stayed up all night googling my ex who blew me off in 2004. I desperately wanted to be serene and in control of everything. Instead, I chain-drank iced coffees and became a manic, tense mess. Plus, I totally isolated myself. I was so stressed that I barely made any time to hang with my BFFs. Our culture paints the whole happily-ever-after-princess-picture when it comes to weddings. But the truth is, merging your life with another's (even if they're your heart and soul and one and only) is pretty freaky and disorienting. Juggling your day-to-day life with the insanity of wedding planning is a tough one: it’s important that you allow yourself to feel the craziness of it all, but not at the expense of your wellness and health. Don’t get me wrong: I’m all for looking luminous and lean on your wedding day, but without having to suffer through the hell of calorie-counting and strict deprivation. Here are some ways to make it happen:
Like three meals a day and two snacks. Protein (chicken, fish, tempeh, cheese), whole grains (quinoa, oatmeal, brown rice), warm, steamed vegetables, and healthy fats, like avocado and olive oil are not only good for your skin and digestion, they’re also great for your mood. Snacks like string cheese, raw nuts, apples, berries and full-fat yogurt will keep your blood sugar stable and your mood elevated, even when your mother-in-law is acting like a monster. Stay away from sugar and white flour and caffeine — you’ll pay for it later when you crash and feel crappy.
A lot. At least eight hours a night. Sleep heals. A few goods nights worth of honest REM goodness will put some pink in your cheeks, reduce the bags under your eyes, and help you to stay perky and ON IT while reviewing your (snooze) sitting chart for the eightieth time.
Not like, three times a day, and please avoid taking multiple classes that have the word “soul”, “fly,” or “core” in them. But definitely raise your heart rate and work up a sweat. Even if it’s a quick walk in the park, jumping up and down to a dusty exercise DVD, or enrolling in a few dorky ZUMBA classes. Even though finding time to exercise can be very annoying, it’s actually one of the easiest routes to a sense of inner peace.
With your best friends. Like laugh hard and inappropriately for hours over multiple cups of tea. There is nothing as attractive as a woman who looks very, very happy. Enough said.
5. HAVE SEX. Yep. Hot, steamy sex, the old-school way. Do it in the shower, beneath the sheets, bust out the sex toys and whacky poses or keep things simple and missionary. Makin’ sweet love is a great way to blow off steam and stay connected to your mate. Don’t forget, this person is the reason you’re suffering through all this craziness to begin with!
Like zone out, stoner-style. Call in sick, put on your sweatpants, twist your hair into your messiest bun, and spread yourself out on the couch like a big ol' potato. Whether it’s “The Bachelor” or an Ashton Kutcher rom-com or a tabloid with Kanye on the cover, turn off your brain and relax. Absolve yourself of any guilt that doing absolutely nothing can sometimes induce. Sometimes, you need to just shut it down NOW in order to rev it up down the line.
In Epsom Salts or relaxing lavender essential oil or even a huge, Dynasty-style bubble bath. Lock the bathroom door, light a candle or two and allow your body to feel floaty and clean and free. It might seem kind of old-lady-like, but the truth is, relaxing in a tub of warm water is a guaranteed way to put your mind and muscles at ease.
Image: Via Victoria's Secret
Believing that weddings ought not bring out the bridezilla in each of us, Stone Fox Bride — a high-fashion boutique in Manhattan — was founded on the principle that planning a wedding is also a process of self-discovery. Molly Guy, creative director at SFB, is our source for the nontraditional bride.