No matter how many romantic comedies we watch, advice columns we read, or love songs we listen to, the truth is that there’s no perfect way to navigate a relationship. And, though it’s scary to admit, we’re all going at it a bit blind. Whether you’ve got a steady S.O., are in the midst of an emotionally exhausting “Where is this going?” talk, or are exploring love of the non-romantic sort, it’s only natural to wish for a guide.
So, in our final installment of Beauty Nation’s The New Provocateurs, we teamed up with Revlon to hear from seven leaders who've made it their professions to learn about, and guide others through, the ins and outs of love, relationships, and sex. If you want the lowdown on how a matchmaker can be more modern than a Tinder swipe, or why breaking off an engagement is sometimes the best idea, read on, and meet the daring women who’ve chosen to wear their hearts on their sleeves as their jobs. All the tough love you ever wanted, straight ahead.
The Comic: Julie Klausner
If you think your love life is out of control, then you’re probably unfamiliar with comedian-writer Julie Klausner, who has made a career of entertaining people with off-color stories inspired by her romantic misadventures. Klausner’s HBO-optioned book, I Don’t Care About Your Band (Gotham, 2010), shares the nitty-gritty details of what her sex life was like in her 20s. Klausner followed that up with a YA novel, Art Girls Are Easy (Poppy, 2013), about a summer-camp teenage love triangle. Then, this year, Klausner co-created and co-starred in the Amy Poehler-produced Hulu Original, Difficult People, about a pair of comedians living and loving in NYC.
As the host of the addicting comedy podcast How Was Your Week?, a regular contributor to New York Magazine, and a writer for a slew of TV shows, Klausner has her finger on the pulse of the changing urban love scene. And, with all those avenues to talk about her dating life, it’s safe to say that the 36-year-old isn’t planning on slowing down on her creative output anytime soon. Up ahead, Klausner dishes on what’s so funny about love.
Why I wrote a book about my love life
“I was very taken by how wounded and damaged the people who came into my life were. When you are hurt that much, you can either give up or you can chew up [the pain] and spit it out. The only way I could make sense of it was to write it down, talk about it, share it with others, and hoped that my honesty would lend itself not only to something altruistic or helpful but that was also really funny. I think the best writing really comes from a very honest place.”
Take your chances
“Dating is like spinning a roulette wheel, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t spin it. It’s important to keep doing things that you love and meet people that also love doing them. And, hopefully that leads to something even if you don’t know what it is.”
I love love (but I have boundaries)
“I think we need each other. We need a certain level of co-dependency to be happy. That’s how we’re bred. I want the record to show I’m pro-love. Just don’t tell me when you are in love. That’s not a thing everyone needs to hear.”
What sets me apart from other comedians
“I think I have a really unique voice that’s impossible to replicate. I have a lot to say, but I think it’s my point of view and the way that I say it that makes me different from others. There’s a certain ‘I don’t give a fuck’ about my style that a lot of people like. I’m not in the business of lying to myself or lying to others. That’s something people who appreciate me appreciate.”
Know when to keep private
“I don’t have the best imagination, so I draw from my own experiences constantly. My love life, even though I wrote a very personal book about it, is private. I make sure my persona is there, but I do have pretty rigid boundaries when it comes to talking about certain things on my podcasts or even when I’m tweeting. It helps keep my insides a little safe. I don’t want to reveal whom I’m dating at the time. That person could hurt you or become the love of your life, so it’s important for me, at least, to keep them safe from pining.”
Topshop pumps, Charlotte Olympia bag, Alexis Bittar necklace and stacked rings, Model's own dress and coat.
Photographed by Ben Ritter; Styled by Sasha Kelly; Makeup by Ashleigh Ciucci; Hair by Adam Maclay.