20 Crucial Fashion Lessons We Learned From Arrested Development

Arrested Development has taught us many things. Things about comedic timing, things about motherly love. But what about fashion? What can we learn from Lucille's many tweed jackets and Lindsay's endless supply of cut-out tops? Upon recently re-watching all three seasons, we've decided the answer to that question is a lot.
Now, these aren't, sartorially speaking, the best outfits. That would involve a lot more Lindsay and a heavy dose of Maggie Lizer and Jessie, the family's one-time publicist. This is about those hidden nuggets of wisdom, which we have teased out with great care. Look, learn, and apply these to your wardrobe immediately.
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Photo: Courtesy of Fox.
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If you want to catch a high-school man's eye, you've got to work the cougar aspect. Try for a sensible, brown suit that says "business babe with a high-fashion attitude."

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If you're going to tell people you have the reflexes of a cat, you better have the agility fuzzy brown vest to match.

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Sudden spiritual revelation in jail, but nowhere to go? Fashion a yarmulke from the toe of your prison shoes.

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If you want to make a bold statement about your sexuality, a tank top is the way to go.

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Case in point.

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Not having fun in the army? Here, this top hat will help.

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Body-slimming tip from Lucille: Tie your tie on the long side to appear "less round."

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If your life calls for a drastic style overhaul, try Tracy's old maternity clothes.

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As Jessica Walter and the Arrested Development wardrobe people clearly know, a good wig is all you need to knock 30 years off your face.

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We interrupt this program for a quick beauty tip: Do not get hair plugs. You will die.

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Oh, and speaking of hair, if you want smooth, shiny locks, a cordless phone is a great tool. You'll just need to be on Teamocil first to see full results.

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If your new wife, who you married on a dare, gets you a sweater, you better wear it.

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If you're visiting your dad in prison and want to make him feel normal and included, wear a sweater in the exact same shade of orange as his jumpsuit.

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You're a powerful, independent woman. You don't need the male gaze to get all dressed up. All you need is yourself, your mirror, and a company credit card.

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Just because you're never nude doesn't mean you can't rock the season's hottest speedo styles for spring break down at Señor Tadpole's.

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All of Rita's outfits are just amazing, and we're only about 40% joking here. The heart-shaped glasses, smiley pin, Clueless-inspired beret — these are all things that have populated Nasty Gal and more of our favorite downtown-cool shops in the last few seasons.

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Protesting something? Lindsay recommends a sexy outfit, should it turn into an impromptu wet T-shirt contest/cage dance.

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If you want to be taken seriously at work, we recommend a $3,000 suit.

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Or maybe $5,000 is the right amount.

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No, actually, $6,300 is just right. Come on!

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