Good News: Drinking Probably Doesn't Make You A Hot Mess

Photographed by Amy Lombard.
You know that moment when you tip over the line of being tipsy, and suddenly it seems to you that you're the funniest person who ever lived on the planet? Or maybe you get really grouchy and snap at everyone. Or maybe you're just loopy.
Depending on what type of drunk you think you are, new research says that it might not be true.
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A study from the journal of Clinical Psychological Science finds that while you may think that alcohol changes your personality, for most people, drinking doesn't actually cause a change.
Researchers tested 156 participants, and gave half of them vodka mixed with Sprite to drink in the laboratory (it was apparently the lead researcher's college drink), Newsweek reports.
Two weeks before the study, the participants all filled out a 50-question survey describing how they perceived themselves when drunk. The questions asked how accurate a statement about their drunk selves were, such as "I am the life of the party," or "I make a mess of things."
These surveys were then tested against observations from both sober peers and trained research assistants to see whether alcohol actually affects these people the way they think it does.
For the most part, it didn't. The researchers noticed no change in the people who said alcohol makes them less anxious or fussier or messier, but they did notice several participants become more extroverted as they drank.
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So if you think alcohol makes you the life of the party, you just might be right. But if you think it takes the edge away from anxiety or makes you seem like a hot mess, then probably not.
Still, there's one drinking myth the study that's all but proved to be true — it gives you the munchies. Before they were allowed to leave the lab, Newsweek reports, all of the study participants had to sober up, and they did so by chilling out and chowing down on some Hot Pockets.
Soooo... when's the next study, and where do we sign up?
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