Whitney Cummings Takes On Sex, Money & Power In Debut HBO Special

Whitney Cummings is not in love with the modern world, or so the material in her debut HBO special, I'm Your Girlfriend, would have us believe — or maybe, it's modern feminism she's got a problem wrapping her hands around. What Cummings is, however, is a master of is sarcasm, encased in a layer of Lucille Ball-esque physicality — if Lucille Ball were much raunchier. Every joke about sex, and there were many, seems to be punctuated with a thrust of the hips, a flip of the head, or a lift of the leg. The latter was especially prominent in her material on squirting, which is apparently the new anal — anal being now de rigueur. Her material on what she doesn't want to do in bed is both hilarious and so detailed that it takes up a good half hour of the set. It's among her best moments, crossing into the absurd when she mimics sex for a prolonged period with her microphone hitting every possible orifice multiple times...including head, shoulders, knees, and toes. And ears. Cummings stumbles when she transitions from a bit about paying for all of her dates into one about public figures and their sexuality. She goes from discussing her newfound understanding of the absurd social and personal constructs that come with being the friend who pays for everything (she does have that sweet 2 Broke Girls money from CBS) to saying she doesn't respect Nicki Minaj because "you can see her butthole" so quickly it will give you whiplash. While Cummings makes compelling observations about her own behavior as a successful woman dating non-alpha males — like how she once suddenly and "out of nowhere" expected a guy she's with to start doing chores — she falls short when she starts calling out other women for exploring their sexuality. Apparently, no one has told her that it's 2016, when a woman can pop and lock and be a boss. I'm Your Girlfriend also gives us this takeaway: When at a Whitney Cummings show, never pipe up and tell her what type of birth control you're on, unless you are prepared to hear her fully unfiltered thoughts on the method. What she has to say might scare the eggs right out of your ovaries.