Your Horoscope For This Week — Sep 27 2015

Illustrated by Lynnie Zulu.
Someone call a peace summit! This week could be fraught with more than the usual amount of conflict. On Monday, the emotional moon and incendiary Uranus join forces in Aries, bringing out everyone’s combative nature. Then, let’s add Mercury retrograde to the recipe. From September 17 to October 9, the planet of communication is backstroking through diplomatic Libra’s domain, making us all a lot less keen on cooperating. This Wednesday, retro Mercury and the ego-driven sun meet up, driving a further wedge between parties. Something’s gotta give, stargazers. Alas, finding that happy medium probably won’t happen this week. When conflict flares up, the best thing we can hope for is that everyone goes to their corners to cool down.

Need a distraction from the drama? The sun-Mercury retrograde meetup takes place in relationship-oriented Libra. It might be easier to work things out between the sheets this week. Of course, better judgment could be lacking under these blurry skies. Dialing up a questionable ex, logging in to Ashley Madison (glug), or getting swept into a throuple when you’re more of a serial monogamist — we’re not judging, but there will be better weeks than this for, um, experimentation. Fortunately, Sunday’s quarter moon in heart-healing Cancer can bring the missing ingredient of compassion to the mix. Feel those feels, stargazers, and let them have a vote too.
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Illustrated by Lynnie Zulu.
Just. Press. Pause. This week is ripe for self-reflection — before you perform, present, or promote your latest offerings to the public. From September 17 until October 9, messenger Mercury is retrograde. And this time, it’s backstroking through the Libra part of the sky (lucky you…not). Under this signal-jamming star map, it ain’t easy to get your point across. On Wednesday, the ego-driven sun syncs up with Mercury retrograde, causing molehills to erupt into mountains. Your trademark diplomacy won’t be easy to access, and you could say some things in anger that you'll live to regret. You could also have a dip in confidence, which causes you to second-guess yourself. Since it’s best to strike while the iron is hot, hold off on your big debuts and bold statements for another week-and-a-half. This time is best used for all “re” activities: researching, refining, revising, and reconfiguring.

With Sunday’s quarter moon in your ambitious 10th house, it won’t be easy to turn off your work brain. Find ways to weave your aspirations into your weekend. Socialize strategically: Meet a successful friend for brunch and pick her brain, or head to a party that doubles as a networking event. Devote a few hours to polishing up your LinkedIn profile and all your social media representation. Let your authentic self be seen, but keep it sophisticated.
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Illustrated by Lynnie Zulu.
Slip into your most comfortable booties and perfectly broken-in boyfriend jeans. This week, Scorpios must retreat and recharge before they burn out. With the sun and Mercury retrograde dancing a paso doble in your dreamy, sleepy 12th house, taking a break is essential. And not just for your wellbeing, Scorpio. Your patience for people won’t be long, so if you force yourself to be social you’ll just wind up snapping at them; or worse, stinging. To avoid burning bridges, call it an early night when your intuition tells you to head home to snuggle your Scottish Fold. But just because you’re tucked away in your honeycomb hideout doesn’t mean you’ll get sucked into a Snapchat wormhole. The muse will pay a visit, and you could be up late painting, writing song lyrics, or practicing dance moves to rival the Lite Feet Nation. An epic night at the club is worth taking a disco nap for, too, as long as you can hit the floor in the protective bubble of your entourage and not have to endure any slurred conversations with strangers.

Sunday’s quarter moon reactivates your wanderlust. While you may not have the time, funds, or vacation days for an epic overseas voyage right now, how about planning a day trip or overnight getaway? Mercury retrogrades are ideal times for reconnecting with old friends. This weekend, you could couch-surf with your college roomie or another memorable person from your past. A change of scenery — with a familiar face — could reboot you after a long, stressful week.
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Illustrated by Lynnie Zulu.
You’re usually an unapologetically independent thinker, Sagittarius. But this week, beware groupthink! Mercury retrograde meets the sun in your 11th house of community, making you susceptible to peer pressure. Going along to get along could leave your name mixed up with the wrong crowd. And while it’s great to rally around a cause, don’t lose yourself in one. You may not agree with the way your cohorts are handling the conflict, especially if they are ODing on the anger or dehumanizing people on the other side of the agenda. But if you’re afraid to voice an independent perspective (or ganged up on if you do), it may be time to defect. Be careful what you post on social media, too, as your tech sector is getting the brunt from the sun-Mercury combo. Your important point could get lost in translation if you type it into your timeline, stirring up needless controversy or damaging trust. And DO check the “reply to” field before sending out an email or firing off a text. This is one of those weeks when autocorrect could fill in “Dad” when you were trying to send Snapchats of your boudoir shoot to “Dan.” Eek!

Sunday’s quarter moon in your secretive eighth house reminds you to check your privacy filters. If you find it hard to keep certain information in the vault, don’t pretend to be anyone’s confidante. Be honest about your inability to play that role. Of course, it may be YOU who is looking for an unbiased ear. Stretching outside your friend group, even booking a session with a coach or therapist, could be your best bet since your pals can never TRULY be objective. Think of it as an investment in your growth — one that can take some pressure off your closest relationships.
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Illustrated by Lynnie Zulu.
Competitive or cutthroat? This week could find you trekking into some questionable terrain. With the ego-driven sun meeting up with Mercury retrograde, you may feel like a nemesis is sneaking up on your lead position. Watch your back, but careful: Getting swept up in a power struggle — or even giving that game the time of day — could put you in a weaker position. Let this be a wakeup call to bring your A game. But remember that the only person you need to compete with is yourself. How can you differentiate yourself from the pack? What’s YOUR unique twist? Instead of trying to gain approval, focus on being authentic. On a positive note, you could reconnect with a boss or colleague from your past — someone who has really helped you shine. Perhaps it’s time to return the favor, give thanks, or explore a follow-up collab.

Sunday’s quarter moon lands in your relationship house, helping you bring yours into better balance. Have you been giving more than you’ve been getting in return — or even giving with the hopes of getting back? Instead of confronting the "selfish" person, just pull back. Your lack of action will be a louder wakeup call than anything. Meanwhile, who are the unsung heroes in your circle? With your busy life, you may have forgotten to acknowledge someone who has your back on the daily like a roommate, your sister, or that coworker who always gets your coffee. Treat them for lunch or drop a card in the mail to nourish these important bonds.
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Illustrated by Lynnie Zulu.
Open mouth, insert…your entire boyfriend-jeans-clad leg? This week could bring some regrettable gaffes if you fail to use filters. Mercury retrograde gets in close contact to the self-expressive sun, making an exact connection on Wednesday. With both heavenly bodies simmering in your candid ninth house, your “oops!” moment could be a big one. Think before you blurt, Aquarius — and that applies to other people’s business as well. Sharing confidential information (yes, even through a secondhand pledge of confidentiality) could come back to haunt you. On a positive note, the sun-Mercury retro meetup could reunite you with someone you met during the summer festival circuit, or a friend who has moved away. If the sparks start flying again, you could go from FaceTiming to planning IRL face time before the week is through.

Sunday’s quarter moon parks in your house of healthy living and efficiency. Use the weekend to bring order to the Aquarius court. Group like objects with like and store them that way. An emergency Ikea run may be in order to get some basic bookshelves or storage bins. Look for ways to save money — those Seamless deliveries are cutting into your entertainment fund! Set yourself up for a week of vitality by cooking healthy meals that you can divide and freeze for your lunches. Then, block out three spots in your calendar each week that are devoted to fitness. The more regularity you have with your schedule, the easier it becomes to fulfill all your goals.
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Illustrated by Lynnie Zulu.
Your eyes are looking rather green there, Pisces. Uh-oh. This week, the illuminating sun syncs up with Mercury retrograde in your competitive, possessive eighth house. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be and have the best. But as the saying goes, “When you compare, you despair.” Jealousy could creep up at the most inconvenient times — when your sister is accepting an award or your BF spends a little too much time chit-chatting with the barista about the café’s single-origin Ethiopian beans. Should envy strike, use it as a compass instead of a sword. If you’re coveting your sister’s award, for example, let that be motivation to master your own talents. And hey, maybe you need to schedule more private time with your bae. The eighth house also happens to be the erotic realm, and the sun-Mercury merger could inspire you to spice up things in the bedroom. Get clear on those safe words first, since Mercury retro CAN cause communication snafus.

Romantically, the weekend will be a bright spot. A quarter moon in your playful, passionate fifth house reminds you of the power that a little fun can bring. Laughter is the best medicine, so let your hair down, Pisces. An epic night of dancing, karaoke, or paintball can revive your spirits AND a relationship. But quarter moons ARE about balance. If you’ve been relying on “social lubricants” to deal with social anxiety, or partying as an escape from the pain of relationship drama, make this a dry weekend — and come up with healthier coping strategies for dealing with what ails you.
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Illustrated by Lynnie Zulu.
Relationships aren’t exactly a walk in the park this week, Aries. As the week begins, the moon and rebellious Uranus align in your sign making you wonder why you even bother with other people sometimes. And even the ones you DO love may seem to be interrupting you from your personal quest. On Wednesday, the self-centered sun and Mercury retrograde mash up in your relationship house and a battle of the egos could ensue. While you’ve never been one to back down from a fight, be careful about taking such a combative stance. Rather than battling for supremacy, try an unconventional tactic: asking questions and listening. This doesn’t mean you’re agreeing or colluding with your so-called nemesis. But Mercury retro’s penchant for scrambling signals could be the culprit of the clash. Turns out this could all be one big misunderstanding.

Partners from your past could pop up this week, too. Some of these reunions will be downright refreshing, reminding you of the person you miss being. But others could be nothing but trouble, so be careful about opening the door to exes and frenemies who really haven’t changed. This weekend, give your inner circle priority. A close friend or relative might need some extra help, or just the mood-boosting pleasure of your company. Host an intimate dinner party or meet your BFFs for brunch. You have a lot to get off your chest, Aries — more than you even realize.
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Illustrated by Lynnie Zulu.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away. And so do vitamin C, rivers of fresh H2O, and triweekly cardio classes. Preventative medicine is the name of the game this week, Taurus, so shimmy into your yoga pants and fire up the juicer. With the sun and Mercury retrograde meeting up in your healthy-living sector this week, don’t go to the opposite extreme and overdo it. If your body is screaming for sleep, hit the hay instead of forcing yourself to do that evening Core Power class. And temperatures are cooling, which means your body may crave warming foods. Swap out some of those salads for roasted veggies, and kill the deprivation mindset. Sometimes a bull’s just gotta have a burger!

Careful about scrambled signals with coworkers this week, too. You’re usually super on top of your game, but this week could find you slacking on some of the details. If you’re having an off day, ask for a deadline extension instead of going AWOL or feigning forgetfulness. People will give you slack if you give them the courtesy of communication. This weekend, be the bridge between old friends and new. With a quarter moon in your house of amigos, you may realize how exhausting it is trying to keep everyone in separate categories. Plan a gathering, and let the social experimentation begin. And tell your friends to bring their friends, because you could feel the click with a tagalong guest.
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Illustrated by Lynnie Zulu.
You love them, you love them not. This week could find you pulling petals off a sunflower, trying to figure out where you stand. Alas, coming to a consensus won’t be easy. Not only is your ruling planet Mercury retrograde in your romance house, but when it meets up with the sun this week, its signal-scrambling powers multiply. Your best bet? Proceed with caution, and don’t make any sudden moves or decisions until Mercury turns direct on October 9. Instead, focus on the getting-to-know-you process — and run your own independent background checks. Coupled Gems should focus on independent interests this week to avoid getting frustrated or overly needy. An ex could flit back into the picture midweek. Careful, Gemini, because this person could do a smash-and-grab with your heart. (Again.) But if it was merely bad timing that kept you apart, keep an open heart. By mid-October, you’ll see if a sequel is in the stars.

Sunday’s quarter moon in your house of practical planning calls for some discernment. Give your to-do list a shakedown, along with your budget. With their vast and varied interests, it’s easy for Geminis to spider out in disparate directions. (Yeezy Season 2 at NYFW, a Kardashian-backed presidential bid…why yes Mr. West, we’re looking at you.) But the multi-hyphenate life can stretch you thin and lead to burnout. Make sure you’re giving time to your top two priorities this fall — which means you’ll probably have to bow out of activities that just aren’t bringing you deep satisfaction.
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Illustrated by Lynnie Zulu.
Check those privacy settings. This week, you’re feeling like a #TrueHomebody, needing more space from the cage-rattling human species than usual. Blame it on Mercury retrograde, which is colluding with the sun in your domestic fourth house. The effects are enough to create a stack of empty pizza boxes and half-finished bottles of Pinot. But don’t let your nesting time go to waste. The sun spurs creative breakthroughs, so let your artsy side take the wheel while you’re at home. Ideas will flow for feathering your nest and making it more functional for yourself. Flip through the décor blogs, fire up Pinterest, and start sketching. But WAIT until Mercury turns direct on October 9 to pick a paint color or start calling contractors to price out the build for a floating staircase.

Do you need to hash out better boundaries with relatives and roommates? Even (or maybe, especially) loved ones have been known to take advantage of your nurturing nature. With Sunday’s quarter moon in Cancer, you’re ready to put your ballet flat down. Gently, please, as quarter moons are about diplomacy and moderation. Give people the benefit of the doubt (maybe they ARE that clueless) while letting them know where your limits lie. This is also the weekend to make a modest investment in yourself, like enrolling in a yoga workshop or getting that go-with-everything handbag.
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Illustrated by Lynnie Zulu.
The struggle is real, Leo — we know, we know. But it might be getting realer, because you are heaping fuel onto the same fire. This week, the radiant and illuminating sun (your celestial ruler) syncs up with Mercury retrograde in your communication house. If you aren’t careful, all those signal-jamming disruptions from Mercury could be majorly magnified. To sidestep a meltdown, pay attention to your words. While we’re not telling you to paint sunshine-yellow over total BS, have you found yourself complaining repeatedly about the SAME problem? The rubber meets the road this week: Either do something about it or change the subject. Your friends are reaching their wits’ end with nodding sympathetically. Take a stab at positive reframing. Instead of moaning, “My boss is driving me crazy,” try, “I am creating better ways to communicate with my boss.” Despite the Pollyanna undertones, this technique shifts you from victim to protagonist.

The solution to your angst may lie in reaching out to a friend, coworker, or collaborator from your past. Pairing up for a sequel might bring another hit, while Mercury’s in reverse until October 9. Or seek mentors — people who are achieving what you’re out to do — and find out their secrets to success. With Sunday’s quarter moon in your 12th house of guides, they could come in the form of coaches, holistic healers, workshop instructors, or even spiritual leaders. Make a budget: You may have to pay for their wisdom, but the time it will save you is priceless.
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Illustrated by Lynnie Zulu.
Order in the Virgo court! This week’s planets bring a wakeup call to organize your life. Yes, even the zodiac’s perfectionist can slip sometimes — you’ve been cooking with gas since expansive Jupiter moved into your sign on August 11. But with Mercury retrograde and the sun synced up in your house of practical magic, you've got to fortify your foundation before adding another wing. Lifehacking alone won’t do. Stop rushing, slow down, and focus on the basics, like balancing your budget and wrangling your schedule back into decent shape. Cut back on some fluff, and make sure you’re giving time to activities that are actually going to pay off. Don’t spend too much time in the break room, gabbing with your work wife about god-only-knows-what. This is a great week not only to get caught up, but also to pull ahead of the competition. Whir away behind the scenes. Your diligence will pay off when Mercury turns direct on the ninth.

This weekend, a quarter moon in Cancer asks you to evaluate your entourage. Is your crew getting a little too cliquey or insular? Cute as you all look with your matching top-handle bags and iPhone cases, it’s getting a little too Ya-Ya Sisterhood here — and others may be feeling left out. Widen the radius and invite in some fresh blood. Do you feel like an outsider in a group? Up your participation level by volunteering to chair an activity or committee. This is a great way to show your commitment and connect to other members. Just don’t swing to the opposite extreme and overcommit yourself. With quarter moons, moderation is key.