Photo: Courtesy of Sanrio.
Hello Kitty, the adorable little cartoon character beloved by Mariah Carey and the world alike, has been fronting this entire time. You see, dear reader, Hello Kitty is not an actual cat. Despite having the word "kitty" in her name, she is just a little girl and not of feline origin. She sits on a brightly colored throne of lies.
Hello Kitty is turning 40 this year, and we're just now learning these important facts about the global icon. Christine R. Yano, an anthropologist from the University of Hawaii, has spent years studying Kitty and is the author of the book Pink Globalization: Hello Kitty's Trek Across the Pacific. It's Yano who filled in the salient details of Hello Kitty's backstory for the Los Angeles Times:
"Hello Kitty is not a cat. She's a cartoon character. She is a little girl. She is a friend. But she is not a cat. She's never depicted on all fours. She walks and sits like a two-legged creature. She does have a pet cat of her own, however, and it's called Charmmy Kitty."
Hello Kitty, whose full name is Kitty White, is British, not Japanese. According to Sanrio, she lives in London with her mama, Mary; papa, George; and twin sister, Mimmy. In addition to her pet cat, she has a hamster named Sugar. She is "around five apples" tall, and weighs "around three apples." Kitty White is a Scorpio, and her birthday is November 1.