How To Make Your Baby A Celebrity

0 comments

rexusa_1894189pwPhoto: Stewart Cook/REX USA.
Now, there are no guarantees that this stratagem will get your current bun in the oven a Golden Globe nod sometime in the mid 2030s, but it sure won't hurt. Answering a question we've all sort of asked in the back of our heads, Vulture's Amanda Dobbins (hey, Amanda) actually sat down and tried to figure out which names would best prepare your baby for a lifetime of fame, fortune, and gifting suites. For this a highly unscientific, but surprisingly compelling, study Dobbins tracked frequencies of the names of all the relevant stars from the top 10 films over a 20-year span.

Now, we have to mention that, despite her hard work, Dobbins conflates coincidence with causation when it comes to names and celebrities (we're pretty sure Jessica Chastain became famous for a number of factors). Moreover, she leaves out television, musical, and literary fame. Nonetheless, she's got a few winners here.

For instance, it's fascinating how clearly "J" is the money initial at the box office. Think of all those Jessicas, Jameses, Jennifers, Johns, Jakes, and Julias out there, and the picture becomes pretty clear. As well, her study reveals that single-syllable names are best for breeding famous boys (Tom, George, Matt, Chris). Meanwhile, two-syllable names work magic for the ladies (Anna, Amy, Kristen, Meryl). There's more where that came from, so if you're interested in giving birth to someone who thanks you in their Oscar speech, get on over to Vulture before your due date. (Vulture)