If you love a good villain as much as we do, then you’ll agree that 2013 was a great year to get your hate on. We're not really sure why we have such an infatuation with baddies, but we just can't help it. We're pretty sure it has something to do with guilt, anxiety, love, redemption, pride, and power. At least, that's what our college literature professor told us. So, a big thank you to Mr. DiMarcopoulus for helping us get to the bottom of it.
The following nine individuals might not be great role models, but they sure did their part to make 2013 the Best. Year. Ever. Think of them like a car crash; you just can't look away. (Yes, we're talking about you, Alec Baldwin!). So, click through for a look back, and, of course, let us know in the comments who your famous arch-nemesis is.
Photo: Courtesy of A24 Productions.
Occupation: Drug dealer, arms dealer, piano player
Most villainous moment: From the first time James Franco’s garish Southern gangster wannabe appears on screen to the final frame, he’s self-aggrandizing, manipulative, and deluded. But, how could we pick anything other than his now iconic “look at my shit!” speech, in which he flaunts the gaudy rewards of a life of petty crime? No wonder Riff Raff was pissed.
Choice quote: "This is my fuckin' dream, y'all. I got shit! I got fuckin' shorts, y'all! I got Scarface on repeat, y'all! I got Calvin Klein Escape!"
Photo: Courtesy of HBO.
Occupation: Former queen of the Seven Kingdoms, femme fatale, brother-lover.
Most villainous moment: Cersei was rather tame in season three compared to season past, but her complicity in the arranged marriage between Tyrion and Sansa may be the sickest thing she’s ever done, which says a lot, considering, well, you know.
Choice quote: “The girl’s flowered I assure you. She and I have discussed it at length.”
Photo: D. DaSilva/RexUSA.
Occupation: Rapper, inventor of the leather jogging pant
Most villainous moment: The egomaniacal hyperbole that emanated from 'Ye during his recent string of WTF interviews was more or less what we’ve come to expect from the arrogant rapper over the years. But, grabbing a paparazzo’s camera and wrestling him to the floor -— which he’s alleged to have done this summer at LAX — has Kanye scaling unprecedented villainy, even by his lofty standards.
Choice quote: “I am Warhol. I am the No. 1 most impactful artist of our generation. I am Shakespeare in the flesh. Walt Disney, Nike, Google — now who's going to be the Medici family and stand up and let me create more or do you want to marginalize me until I'm out of my moment.”
Photo: Courtesy of AMC.
Occupation: Pest control expert, devoted nephew, kid killer
Most villainous moment: In “Granite State," the penultimate episode of Breaking Bad, the little-sociopath-that-could executes Jesse’s friend Andrea by shooting her point blank in the head as Jesse is forced to watch. Ice. Cold.
Choice quote: “I’m sorry for your loss.”
Photo: Courtesy of Lionsgate.
Occupation: Ruthless dictator, staunch advocate of public floggings
Most villainous moment: In the ridiculously successful The Hunger Games sequel, the Panem Prez is fuming, after the trickery Katniss pulled at last year’s games turned her into a universal symbol of hope. That’s when the devious Snow decides to have the tributes for the next games selected from the existing pool of victors, ensuring that Katniss will once again have to compete in the arena of death. Sorry, President Snow, but don’t you know there’s a third book?
Choice quote: “You fought very hard in the Games, Miss Everdeen. But, they were games. Would you like to be in a real war? Imagine thousands of your people, dead. Your loved ones, gone.”
Photo: Erik Pendzich/RexUSA.
Occupation: Disgraced celebrity chef, former Georgia peach
Most villainous moment: Before Paula Deen’s career went kaboom after she casually admitted to using racial slurs at work, she was found guilty — in the court of public opinion — of something far more treacherous. After spending the better part of a decade contributing to America’s obesity epidemic with her sugar-heavy recipes, it was revealed earlier this year that the queen of dessert pizzas and deep-fried-everything was also a diabetic, making her the world’s biggest hypocrite.
Choice quote: "You know, I am so sick of [turning] on my television, and everyone on it is obsessed with living forever. Well, I have a news flash: Ain't none of us getting out of here alive."
Photo: REX USA/Picture Perfect.
Occupation: Part-time actor, outspoken Democrat, professional slur-hurler
Most villainous moment: Alec Baldwin and the paparazzi don’t get along. That much we know. But, this past year between the warring sides was particularly brutal and came to a head when Baldwin was caught on tape using a gay slur toward one of his camera-wielding nemeses. Cue the backlash. The beleaguered actor was subsequently relieved of his duties as an MSNBC talk show host and has since lost what little goodwill he had left in Hollywood. We miss you, Jack Donaghy.
Choice quote: “I’m not interested in offending anyone. If homosexuality was an issue for me, I would have moved out of New York years ago. I find that laughable.”
Occupation: Disgraced cycling champion, humanitarian, pathological liar
Most villainous moment: That interview. When most people confess to their crimes, they’re supposed to be redeemed in some way. But, when Armstrong told Oprah what the world already knew — that he had lied to investigators about doping while attempting to systematically destroy the lives of all those who accused him — he did so with such callous indifference.
Choice quote: “I took that attitude — the ruthless, relentless, win-at-all-costs attitude — into cycling. That was, in my view, part of the job.
Miley Cyrus’ Tongue
Occupation: Alien parasite, contortionist
Most villainous moment: Its coming-out party was at the performance, but the moment we knew it had a mind of its own was when we saw the way it treated that sledgehammer like something that’s not a sledgehammer in the "Wrecking Ball" video. That’s when we knew: Miley’s tongue has become self-aware.
Choice quote: “You can try to contain me, but unless you physically stitch Miley’s mouth shut, you’ll never get rid of me. Wait, forget I said that.”