It Happened This Week: Obama Gets Dogged, Michael Jackson Infected With Balmania, Lohan Uses eHarmony Like Us Single Folk

vogue-mixed-up-cover1. Vogue comes out with its annual model-heavy issue, except they can't seem to tell their own models apart. Those darn waifish Europeans. (Jezebel)
2. Topshop keeps its door like a Meatpacking nightclub to further the hype. Yeah, we had the same idea when we were in college to run a dorm party that way—maybe if we'd gone through with it we wouldn't be blogging right now. (NYP)
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3. Who cares if Michael Jackson doesn't want to auction off his shiny gloves—we want him to auction off his new shiny Balmain t-shirt instead! (Grazia)
4. Whitney Port goes back to work for Kell on Earth, Ms. Cutrone of People's Revolution. Good, that Elle cover shoot drama was starting to get played out anyway. (NYP)
5. Lindsay Lohan uses eHarmony just like us poor, miserable, single civilian folk who need to place an online personals ad just to catch a date. Except unlike us, she uses the ad as secret product placement. Maybe this is why we are still broke. But wait, apparently, so is she. (The Cut)
6. The Obamas welcome newcomer Bo into the family. That multi-colored collar will sure net him a place on the best-dressed pets list. (People)
7. Oprah finally joins Twitter, and, along with it, officially enters the "21st century." Welcome, O. Now all you have to do is play Facebook message tag and agonize over ambiguous text messages, and you'll really be part of the new age. (Twitter)