Don't Try To Pretend You're Oprah

OK, let's face it. There's not a whole lot that Oprah does that could be emulated by the average human.
That's because Oprah is, in fact, not of this planet. Like the angels of yore, Oprah doesn't sit down and eat a meal as we do; instead, her food simply evaporates into her body, strengthening her inhuman powers and expanding the scope of her all-seeing eye like some kind of self-improving Sauron.
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Short version: She's magical.
BuzzFeed knows this, too. In a recent video, it tested one its staffers by asking her to emulate the mannerisms of The Great O. Being a mere Earth-dweller, however, she predictably floundered.
The moral of the story? Don't try to throw pens at your coworkers, and the next time you bring your entire CSA box to the office, don't label it your "favorite things." That kind of behavior is reserved for beings like Oprah, who will summon a plague of bees if you anger her. (Buzzfeed)
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