We're not one to judge anyone's mobile gaming habits. Kim Kardashian: Hollywood grosses $43 million a quarter and people are literally addicted to Candy Crush, and that's just the world we live in. But, this may be the strangest (creepiest?) gaming trend we've ever seen. Welcome to the world of Awesome Princess Dentist.
"Can you help out these princess patients?" reads the description. "Become a dentist and have fun cleaning up teeth! Let's be sure the princesses are ready for the royal ball!" The game comes with a starter princess (you unlock more with every procedure), seated in a dentist chair, jaw agape and gnarly teeth bared. The image is hard to describe, but it sort of looks like Beauty and the Beast's Belle — if Belle was half shark. The user then cleans, drills, polishes and decorates Shark-Belle's teeth with stickers and jewels. That's how you win? I guess?
The real question is, of course, WTF? Is this supposed to be educational? Is this an innovative way to market medical careers to little girls? Is it meant to alleviate fear of the dentist? Or, are these just a little bit off? Above all, why are there so many princess dentist games?
According to our last count, there are nine princess-dentist games available on iPhone, Android, Google Play, and various mobile sites. You've got little-girl princesses, sexy teenaged princess, even the Frozen princesses — all of whom need serious dental work.
Each of these games is a little different in its setup and its inscrutable creepiness factor. Why is Elsa crying? What's up with Princess Aura's dark blue molars? Why is there a function to "stroke her hair?" Take a look for yourself and decide for yourself. Which princess-dentist mobile game is right for you? And, what exactly is going on here?