The Pros & Cons Of Dating A Friend — From People Who’ve Been There

So, you’re starting to fall for a friend. You’re gazing at them from across the room while you're at a party, you're over-analyzing texts and you're bringing their name up every opportunity you get (aka mention-itis). But what, if anything, should you do about your crush? Should you try to kill your feelings, or should you actually act upon them and ask your friend out?

First, know that it’s totally normal, if not common, to fall for a friend. Studies indicate that most of us find people more attractive the more we spend time with them — familiarity breeds attraction. In psychology, it’s called the propinquity effect, meaning the more often someone interacts with another person, the more likely it is that they will form a friendship or romantic relationship with that individual. This might also explain why so many of us feel like we never meet anyone we actually like on dating apps. But asking a friend out can be a lot more intimidating than messaging that Hinge match.

“Dating a friend comes with risks, such as the possibility of breaking up and losing a good friend, or even your social group falling apart if both parties hang out with the same friends,” says Maria Sullivan, dating expert and VP of Dating.com. “However, dating a friend can also lead to true love, so it is always a good idea to give it a try if you believe it will lead to something great.”

Ahead, we hear from real people who have actually fallen for a friend and how it did (or didn’t) work out for them.