Breaking Down 31 Days Of Non-Stop Kardashian Drama

Photo: MediaPunch/REX/Shutterstock.
The drama that will come to define the first half of 2019 is, hands down, the messy situation between Khloé Kardashian, Jordyn Woods, and Tristan Thompson. A love triangle between one of the most famous reality stars, her (already sus) athlete boyfriend, and the best friend of the world's youngest self-made billionaire (more on that later) would be juicy and shocking enough, but that's far from the whole picture. The headline-making and gossip-producing scandal is just one of many intertwining Kardashian moments leading up to the premiere of season 16 of Keeping Up with the Kardashians.
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It started when Woods tipsily made out with Thompson at a party that fateful February night, and we can bet that the reverberations from that one moment will last us up until March 31, like clockwork. Because while we're watching Woods on Red Table Talk with Jada Pinkett Smith, Kim Kardashian West is getting people out of prison, Kanye West is maybe starting his own church, Kourtney Kardashian is dating Travis Barker, Robert Kardashian is battling with Blac Chyna, and Kylie Jenner is literally making history. And we're not even halfway through the month yet, which means we have about 20 more days of drama.
Because the family is flooding the zone, we're keeping track of the biggest Kardashian moments each weekday in March, leading up to the premiere. No, we are not being paid by the Kardashians to do this. I just like to use my graduate degree to do God's work. Let's do this.
1 of 20
March 27

Kim Kardashian West

Kim Kardashian West shared the new trailer for season 16, which premieres March 31, and it looks like the Tristan Thompson drama is making it into the season after all. Khloé is a wreck in every scene, and there's even a very pointed Jordyn Woods reference. It looks like the family is going to do their best to make us rally around Khloé, not Jordyn. Oh, the drama.
2 of 20
March 26

Jordyn Woods goes across the pond for her eyelash line's London debut. She is, at this moment, doing great.
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3 of 20
March 25

Khloé Kardashian

Khloé has other stuff on her mind than her troubles with Tristan and promoing diet shakes — it's almost Easter and she is busy putting together Easter baskets. She asked for fans help to choose which stories she should include. A sweet pivot towards wholesome content.

Tristan Thompson

Ah, Tristan. Does he really now know that everyone is watching his social media accounts with a magnifying glass? He must, which is why fans got the message loud and clear when he shared a short clip on Instagram of him listening to a song about bringing secrets to the grave. Yes, Tristan. We know you got secrets. I'm sure Khloé is grateful for the reminder.
4 of 20
March 22

Jordyn Woods

Miss Woods is now the muse of Team 10 alumni Justin Roberts. She appears in the music video for his song, "Way Too Much." The two met on the set of the music video (read: they met post-scandal), and Roberts told Access Hollywood that they were on the path towards friendship. The official music video drops April 14, but here's a taste of the new company Woods is keeping. Yes, that is Kim Kardashian's best friend, Jonathan Cheban.
5 of 20
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my baby is stuck to me like glue lately?

A post shared by Kylie (@kyliejenner) on

March 21

Kylie Jenner

Fans are convinced that Kylie is secretly sharing news that she is pregnant, despite her telling Interview Germany that while she wants more kids, she isn’t trying for one now. But still, as Harpers Bazaar writes, Instagram is buzzing with speculation that her recent poses with Stormi on her stomach indicate she’s getting a sibling. Hmm.

Khloé Kardashian

It’s never a dull moment for Khloé Kardashian who is currently being dragged for promoting nutritional shakes. Actress Jameela Jamil called out Khloé on Instagram for not revealing that in additional to allegedly drinking these weight loss drinks (and often scam drinks), she has skilled professionals assisting and guiding her fitness journey.
6 of 20
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?

A post shared by HEIR JORDYN (@jordynwoods) on

March 20

Jordyn Woods

Jordyn Woods is slowly but surely regaining her footing following the scandal. She is reportedly being flooded with offers from brands, proving that there was no real loser in this whole cheating scandal. Except for maybe Tristan Thompson. She also liked a tweet that praised her for looking better than ever, post-drama. That glow, tho.
7 of 20
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My Friends: Let’s Have A Chill Night Me:

A post shared by Kylie (@kyliejenner) on

March 19

Kylie Jenner

Kylie Jenner has found a solution for her Jordyn problem: make new friends — and in this case, don’t keep the old. According to a source to People, Kylie is looking to expand her inner circle with new faces and friendships. Makes sense.
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8 of 20
March 18

Kim Kardashian

Kim Kardashian celebrated the 38th birthday of her former boss, Paris Hilton. Kim famously was Paris’ assistant at the start of her career, and though the two experienced a rough patch as Kim gained her footing as a reality star, the pair of socialites are close friends again.
9 of 20
March 15

Khloé Kardashian

Mike Fleiss, of ABC's The Bachelor and Bachelorette, teased on Twitter that Khloé was in the running to be the next Bachelorette, but ultimately didn't make the final cut. Khloé responded directly the rumors, essentially telling him to fuck off because she's going through some shit. Now, Rob Mills, reality chief at the network, is finally putting the joke to rest. “Mike Fleiss and Kris Jenner do know each other well," he told Variety. "They judged Miss America together, so they’ve spent some time together, and Kris is a friend to the show. It was very premature. And to be honest, Khloe’s not wrong. She’s going through something and she was right to be a little miffed because this is an incredibly sensitive time for her. I don’t think there was any really conversation because it’s not the right time to have that conversation.”

Kourtney Kardashian

Travis Barker finally responds to the steady rumors that he is dating the oldest Kardashian sister, by denying it fully. He told People that he is close friends with the Kardashian family and he loves her "dearly" as a friend, and that's it.
10 of 20
"
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Focused and Motivated

A post shared by Khloé (@khloekardashian) on

March 14

Tristan Thompson

Thompson turned 28 today. The Cavalier wished their played a happy birthday on Instagram only to have their comment section filled with trolls and clapbacks.

Khloé Kardashian

While Thompson was being torn apart over on his basketball team’s Instagram, Khloé was posting messages about trying to “forget” someone despite missing them. Hmm.
11 of 20
March 13

Kylie Jenner

Kylie dyed her hair ice blue, which reminded everyone of when Kim did the same. She also revealed the other names she considered before she and Travis Scott settled on Stormi. The first name she considered was “Rose,” she said in an Instagram Live. She also said that she originally wanted to name her Stormie with an “e” to look like Kylie, but then decided to drop it.

Tristan Thompson

Sites reported that Thompson isn’t involved in True’s life right now, instead enlisting the “I’ll see her when I see her” attitude.

Jordyn Woods

A hair line posted a meme mocking Woods’ hair, and eventually apologized after receiving backlash. The meme mocked not only Woods’ hair extension, but also the rumor that she had been financially dependent on Kylie Jenner previously to the cheating scandal. The 21-year-old did not respond to the meme or the apology.
12 of 20
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Name: Penelope, Nickname: Poosh

A post shared by Kourtney Kardashian (@kourtneykardash) on

March 12

Kardashian-Jenner crew

The sisters had a little GNO sans Kendall Jenner to celebrate...life? While Khloé, Kim, Kylie, and Kourtney partied on the West Coast, Kendall went on a tour de nightlife with a few other models in NYC.

Kourtney Kardashian

The most elusive of the sisters, Kourtney reveals a new lifestyle line called “Poosh,” inspired by her daughter Penelope’s nickname. Details beyond that are unclear. As Refinery29 lifestyle writer Olivia Harrison puts it: “it's too vague to actually explain anything about what Poosh actually is.”
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13 of 20
March 11

Kim Kardashian

Kim Kardashian stars teasing an eyewear collection with Caroline Lemke. The models for all the glasses? Kim. Lots of her — as in, she enlisted a bunch of Kim Kardashian doppelgangers to model the frames. We should get used to the whole Kardashian-Jenner sporting these shades.
14 of 20
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♥️

A post shared by Kylie (@kyliejenner) on

March 7

Jordyn Woods

According to The Blast, one of the first people to smash the like on this photo of Kylie was Jordyn Woods. She must have unliked after realizing the media attention a single double tap would garner (or perhaps she never did and the screenshot is wrong), but either way, this moment was a flash of hope. Will these two former friends ever be close again?

Khloé Kardashian

Over on Khloé's page, the sad/inspiring messages keeping pouring in. Her latest, posted Thursday evening? "Hearts like ours are special. They should be treasured, not broken." The next, Friday March 7, Khloé spent hanging out with True. Sites are reporting that despite the betrayal, Khloé wants Tristan at their daughter's upcoming birthday party. True turns 1 next month.
15 of 20
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An a whatta???

A post shared by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

March 6

Tristan Thompson

The pot continues to be stirred by one Tristan Thompson. On Wednesday night, the player (of basketball.......) was seen out with a "mystery woman" who was later identified to be model Karizma Ramirez. According to sources, the two spent four hours at Nobu in New York (which is probably the same amount of time Kid Cudi spent celebrating his birthday with Timothée Chalamet, Pete Davidson, and Kanye West), attracting the attention of paparazzi, who Thompson later gave the bird.

Khloé Kardashian

Meanwhile, Khloé was back at home in Calabasas with their daughter True, reminding us that she was indeed still recovering from this public betrayal. In an Instagram caption she wrote, "I believe in you, your abilities and you heart! Stay positive about everything. Each one of us, is simply trying to figure it all out."

Down the road, Kourtney and Kylie promoted their respective brands and social agreements (Kylie, her makeup line, and Kourtney, Kendall's Beats Apple Music show). And Kim wore a beret in France.

More berets, less cheating men!
16 of 20
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thank you @forbes ?

A post shared by Kylie (@kyliejenner) on

March 5

Kylie Jenner

Forbes announced that Kylie Jenner is the youngest self-made billionaire. This is the second time the words "Kylie" and "self-made" have appeared together and caused an uproar. The narrative around her being an independent woman, not dependent on a man for her or her daughter's well being, feels especially timely considering the rumors that Travis Scott was cheating on Jenner. (He also previously deleted, then reactivated his Instagram.)

Khloé Kardashian

Khloé continued to share cryptic messages on her Instagram, which makes me think her iPhoto album must look like a sorority girl's "inspirational quotes" Pinterest board
17 of 20
March 4

Kris Jenner

Kris Jenner cemented her status as momager by appearing in an Instagram promo video for Marvel's Captain Marvel. It's only a matter of time before she figures out how to outsmart Thanos and save the world.

Kourtney Kardashian

Kourtney Kardashian and Travis Barker are rumored to be dating. Do you remember Barker? He's the skinny, tattooed drummer for Blink-182 who once appeared on his own MTV reality show alongside ex-wife and former beauty queen Shanna Moakler.

Khloé, Kendall & Kylie

Khloé, Kendall, Kylie, and friends all celebrated Kylie's assistant's birthday at various locations: Kylie's decorated home, and a moody skate rink. (These are all events that Jordyn Woods would have definitely been included in.)
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18 of 20
March 3

Kim Kardashian West

While all this Khloé shit is hitting the fan, Kim Kardashian West enjoyed a calm Sunday church service with her family, and a full-blown choir. The Sunday Services, hosted by Kanye West in a studio in Los Angeles, have become a topic of conversation on their own. Is it a religion? A church? Or just a mildly religious jam session? Who knows.

Kourtney Kardashian

Meanwhile, Kourtney relaxed at home.
19 of 20
March 2

Khloé Kardashian

After cooling off from the heat of Friday's interview, Khloé re-evaluated who was to blame in this scenario. Instead of wholly dragging the 21-year-old model, Khloé shifted the blame to her now-ex, Thompson. "What’s been harder & more painful is being hurt by someone so close to me," she wrote on Twitter. "Someone whom I love & treat like a little sister. But Jordyn is not to be blamed for the breakup of my family. This was Tristan’s fault." Perhaps she read our piece on the matter.
20 of 20
March 1

Jordyn Woods

"I'm no homewrecker." Those are the iconic lines delivered by Jordyn during her highly-memed interview with Jada Pinkett Smith. The interview, which featured a candid explanation and timeline of what happened between Tristan and Jordyn, came two weeks after TMZ published the initial rumor.
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