Skinny-Jean Wearers More Happy, Less Environmentally Friendly

What do skinny jeans say about who you are? If you answered that skinny-jean wearers are trend rebels who don't prioritize ankle circulation, you're wrong. According to a survey conducted by Qualtrics, we can tell all kinds of things about your happiness, confidence, and even whether or not you recycle — just by how pegged your legs are. First up, the happiness factor. According to the survey, skinny jean-wearers are 9% more likely to report "the highest levels of happiness" than their non-skinnies-wearing counterparts (maybe for defectors of the stem-hugging pants, happiness means leaving a little of your leg shape to viewers' imaginations). Less baffling is the stat that people who describe themselves as "extremely or very confident are 12% more likely to wear skinny jeans." Clearly it does take a certain level of self-assuredness to rock the world's least forgiving pant shape (the rest of you are welcome to come join me in Flare Town). The factoid that on airplanes, "aisle-sitters are more likely to wear skinny jeans than window-sitters" sounds like some sort of psychic sorcery, until you consider the fact that those tight-pants wearers may be that much more desperate to stretch their gams during a long flight. Watch the full video below, in which a weirdly bookish surfer dude provides us with all sorts of additional, enlightening results from the survey, including the fact that skinny-jean wearers apparently suck at recycling. Maybe because they're totally exhausted from doing the skinny-jean squat?