As a kid, I loved watching Pee Wee’s Playhouse (1986-1990). All of those bright colors and loud, funny noises distracted young viewers from what was actually a maniacal man talking to furniture and singing about tequila. When I heard there was a movie called Pee Wee’s Big Adventure, I couldn’t understand why my parents hadn’t rented it from the video store (I know...how quaint) for my brother and me to watch. Surely it would just involve more Pee Wee’s Playhouse hijinks, but on a larger scale.
Oh, how misguided I was. When I finally wore my mother down and got my hands on Pee Wee’s Big Adventure, it was straight-up nightmare city. The bike scene with the demonic clowns…Large Marge…how is that movie rated PG?
In honor of Pee Wee’s Big Adventure’s 30th anniversary, we rounded up a whole slew of movies that are ostensibly for children — but are so NSFK (not suitable for kids). It should go without saying, but childhood-ruining, loss-of-innocence-inducing, disturbing, and emotionally scarring spoilers ahead.