How To Do The Sexy Halloween Costume, According To Victoria's Secret

Halloween is right around the corner, which means the streets are about to get weird. Every October, we're inundated with one inappropriate halloween costume after the next — on previous years' lineups: Caitlyn Jenner, Cecil The Lion, and those of offbeat (er, curated) identities — but if you're scraping the barrel for what to be this time around, look no further than the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. No, really.

Victoria's Secret often treats its themes with as much subtlety as many people on Halloween do — which is to say, none at all. So there's a lot to look out for with each broadcast (like the time it sent Karlie Kloss down the runway wearing a Native American-themed bikini and then yanked it from the taped show before it aired). Aside from cultural appropriation, there have also been tons of questionable sexified looks, from a clown to a gym rat to, yes, even a Tinkertoy. That's what makes cataloguing them all so fun.

Much like Victoria's Secret's paradigm of the female body type, these 30+ costumes — and their boob-forward sex appeal — are to be taken lightly, and serve as mere inspiration for this October 31. Ahead, you'll see some of the best (and worst) looks from the show's past 10 years that will definitely get you in the Halloween spirit. And, as a friendly reminder: Don't be afraid to get a little funny with it — avec tact, of course.

Photo: Victor VIRGILE/Gamma-Rapho/Getty Images.
Sexy Tinsel
Fun fact: When tinsel comes in long, narrow strips, it's called "lametta." Unfortunately, the phrase 'Sexy Lametta' didn't exactly roll off the tongue. But look how shiny.
Photo: Victor VIRGILE/Gamma-Rapho/Getty Images.
Sexy Bow
This one's for those who get into the Christmas spirit a little...early.
Photo: Bryan Bedder/Getty Images.
Sexy Tinkertoy
We hope you didn't throw them away!
Photo: Arun Nevader/Getty Images.
Sexy Graduate
Because getting a diploma is sexy, right?
Photo: Thomas Concordia/Getty Images.
Sexy Snowflake
For those wanting to be a snowflake: Paint a bunch of twigs white, glue them all together, slap on a pair of your most bejeweled undergarments and some heels, and you're out the door in a flash.
Photo: Thomas Concordia/Getty Images.
Sexy Slumber Party
No snooze buttons allowed.
Photo: John Parra/Getty Images.
Sexy Santa's Little Helper
When you're employed by Saint Nick, building toys all day comes with the hefty price of freezing your limbs off.
Photo: Randy Brooke/Getty Images.
Sexy Gym Rat
But how is she going to hold her candy bag and a set of dumbbells?
Photo: Mike Coppola/Getty Images.
Sexy Boxer
Talk about a knockout.
Photo: Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty images.
Sexy Diaphragm
Because what else could she be?
Photo: George Napolitano/Getty Images.
Sexy Quarterback
We're pretty sure this is not how football works...but whatever.
Photo: Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images.
Sexy Jester
Juggling not included.
Photo: Arun Nevader/Getty Images.
Sexy...Discoball
Make of this what you will, but we're going with a good old piece of '70s party decor.
Photo: Mark Mainz/Getty Images.
Sexy Stewardess
This outfit is not only iconic because it glorifies a wardrobe that otherwise consists of a blazer with shoulder pads, but also Karolina Kurkova's shoe fell off seconds after this photo was taken.
Photo: Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images.
Sexy Clown
We're going to go ahead and say that only Victoria's Secret could turn a concept so terrifying as a clown into something so appealing. Plus, those polka dots are pretty cute.
Photo: Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images.
Sexy Seashell
You'll be the glitziest underwater creature of them all.
Photo: Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images.
Sexy Cat
Meow.
Photo: Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images.
Sexy America
Lily Aldridge: Keeping the United States looking good, two gold lamé opera-length gloves at a time.
Photo: Peter Kramer/Getty Images.
Sexy Indian Chief
No. Just no.
Photo: Kevin Mazur/Getty images.
Sexy Poodle
Don't forget the hoop component to this one. Because otherwise, you're just wearing a couple of pink balls and some panties, which some people could easily interpret as cotton candy. And that's a little weird.
Photo: Thomas Concordia/Getty Images.
Sexy Popcorn
Getting kernels lodged in one's bra on any other occasion would be considered an unusual (and uncomfortable) occurrence, but alas, it's Halloween.
Photo: Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images.
Sexy Leprechaun
But make sure you get your clover leaf count right.
Photo: Arun Nevader/Getty Images.
Sexy Little Bo Peep
This one is entirely up to you.
Photo: Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images.
Sexy Cheerleader
An oldie but a goodie, the allover rah-rah costume never fails. Remember though, four pompoms sure are better than two.
Photo: Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images.
Sexy Candy Cane
You might have trouble fitting through doors with this one, but wearing an uncomfortable costume on Halloween is kind of par for the course.
Photo: Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images.
Sexy Ring Leader
Whip accessory not necessary.
Photo: Kevin Mazur/Getty images.
Sexy Season
Because autumn is so hot right now.
Photo: Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images.
Sexy Beach Babe
If you ask us, ditch the giant beach ball and grab the towel. It's cold in October.
Photo: Kevin Mazur/Getty images.
Sexy Tiger
For when you want to be the cat's meow.
Photo: Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images.
Sexy Sock Monkey
Perhaps the only Halloween costume you won't regret waking up in the next morning.
Photo: Kevin Mazur/Getty Images.
Sexy Flowers From Alice In Wonderland
"Little bread-and-butter flies kiss the tulips / And the sun is like a toy balloon..."
Photo: Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images.
Sexy Oblina From Aaahh!!! Real Monsters
Let's be honest, she was the best.
Photo: Bryan Bedder/Getty Images.
Sexy Cowgirl
Don't you have a rope that defies the laws of gravity?
Photo: Victor Virgile/Gamma-Rapho/Getty Images.
Sexy Frozen
Do you want to build a snowman?
Photo: Adam Jeffery/Getty Images.
Sexy Flag
Because being an American is sexy.
Photo: Victor Virgile/Gamma-Rapho/Getty Images.
Sexy Balloon(s)
Pay attention to narrow doors, trees, and heat lamps.
Photo: Victor Virgile/Gamma-Rapho/Getty Images.
Sexy Tumbleweed
But seriously, what are those?
Photo: Adam Jeffery/Getty Images.
Sexy Butterfly
Remember: Before you're a butterfly, you're a caterpillar.
Photo: Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images.
Sexy Cop
Hm...maybe save this one for next year.
Photo: Victor Virgile/Gamma-Rapho/Getty Images.
Sexy Firework
Okay, this one may be a little dangerous.
Photo: Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images.
Sexy Hippie
Everybody say love! L-O-V-E.
Photo: Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images.
Sexy Firefighter
It's gettin' hot in herre/so hot/so take off all yo' clothes.
Photo: Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images.
Sexy Sock
Hey, at least you'll be cozy.
Photo: Michael Stewart/FilmMagic.
Sexy Twinkle Emoji
Everybody's favorite sparkle emoji just got that much...sparklier...(don't quote us on that).
Photo: Victor Virgile/Gamma-Rapho/Getty Images.
Sexy Astronaut
Don't forget your helmut!
Photo: Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images.
Sexy Surfer
Ready to catch some waves? Or some candy corn?
Photo: Taylor Hill/Getty Images.
Sexy American Psycho
This one my be a stretch (get it? because suspenders?), but at least the fake blood is optional.
Photo: Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images.
Sexy Soul Cycle Rider
Got to counteract that candy somehow. Who's ready to sweat?
Photo: Taylor Hill/Getty Images.
Sexy Invisibility Cloak
Sure, this version carries more sparkles than Harry's, but we bet if they could go back in time and do it again, the Invisibility Cloak would look a lot more like this.
Photo: Taylor Hill/Getty Images.
Sexy Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
C'mon. You can't deny those ruffles don't contain magical piano playing abilities.
Photo: Taylor Hill/Getty Images.
Sexy Mardi Gras
It might seem a little weird to celebrate another holiday on another holiday, but can you think of a better excuse to get double the candy?
Photo: Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images.
Sexy Burning (Wo)man
Get Black Rocky City-ready in no-time (batteries not included).
Photo: Taylor Hill/Getty Images.
Sexy Crow
Hm... This one might actually be more scary than sexy.
Photo: Taylor Hill/WireImage.
Sexy Vape
Come on. If you squint your eyes just enough, it's like a smoke cloud of sweet peach-mango aroma.
Photo: Francois G. Durand/WireImage.
Sexy Yodeler
Yeah, they went there. And you can, too!
Photo: Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images.
Sexy Mobile
Because being a fly on the wall is just too boring.