In honor of International Kissing Day on July 6, we're bringing this story to your attention again.
Kissing is something everyone learned how to do perfectly in high school, right? Wrong. Like every aspect of physical intimacy,
kissing technique can always be honed and perfected to suit your changing tastes, as well as your partner's. But the thing is, many adults don't give it enough thought, since learning how to kiss is often associated with our awkward teen years.
In fact, many of us are rushing through foreplay (and presumably, kissing): Researchers have found that
the average foreplay lasts 13 minutes, even though most people want it to last a few minutes longer. And what's a fun way to extend foreplay? Among the many awesome options, more kissing. That may sound obvious, but everyone could use a refresher now and then.
So whether you're completely new to the wonderful world of kissing or you just want to sharpen your make-out skills, here are some tips and tricks that will leave your partner begging for more.
Keep it fresh. If you're making out with someone new, especially if you just had a dinner date that involved garlic or onions, it can't hurt to keep a handy box of mints in your pocket. Of course, there's no reason to feel ashamed about your breath (it's probably fine); in fact, many people out there report enjoying the particular taste of their partner's mouth. But if gum or mints will make you feel more confident, you do you.
Explore biting. Biting is a fairly naughty move, but that's what makes it so hot. If you've been kissing for a while and the sexual tension starts to rise, try lightly nibbling your lover's lip. Make the first bite very gentle and flirty to see how they react. If they're into it (you can always ask if you're not sure), you can keep on going, integrating biting into your kissing repertoire. (Just don't break your partner's skin, please.)
Don't be afraid to go deep with your tongue. Tongue gets a bad rap sometimes, since some people overuse it or use it wrong, but a deeply passionate kiss can include some deep tongue action. After you've used your tongue to glide your partner's lips apart, and you've teased them with light tongue action, slowly slide your tongue deep into your partner's mouth. Then, move it in circular, up-and-down motions. When kissing, you and your partner naturally feed off each other's energy, so if they're into it, your partner will likely follow suit and insert their tongue inside your mouth, too. Then you can enjoy the lustful mingling of your tongues intertwined. There is one no-no you want to avoid: lazy tongue. That's when you stick your tongue into your partner's mouth and just let it sit there like a heavy, motionless, wet sponge. That doesn't sound so appealing, right? So when you're using tongue, stay in tune to your partner's motions and work together.
Talk about what you like. Let us solve most of your sex and relationship problems with one simple tip: communicate. Some people like a lil' biting; others enjoy intense, deep, tongue penetration; and some people don't like to get messy. Want to know how your partner likes to be kissed? Ask them.
Tease with light touch. Kissing isn't just about the mouth. And no, eager tongue, it's not all about you, either. To ensure a proper make out session, or to set the mood to initiate one, arouse your partner with light touch. Try gently brushing your hands along their arms, legs, or back. You might not associate these areas with sexual intimacy, but it can be really exciting to start small and work your way up to the genitals (if that's where you'd like to go, that is). If you glide your fingers up and down your partner's thigh, the eroticism of the tease will enhance your kiss.
Lean in. Anticipation is half the fun of kissing, even with someone you've kissed hundreds of times. Rather than just grabbing your partner's face, tease them by taking your time while leaning in. This will up the eroticism level, and give you time to think about all of the things you want to do to them (and vice versa) — which tends to result in the perfect come-kiss-me eyes. Start by making eye contact and pause. When you can tell they're excited, lean in and hover for a moment in front of their lips before kissing them.
Play with tongue, but know that less is more. If you want to take a kiss from casual to passionate, begin using tongue. Sex educator Kenneth Play says that it's important to start "nice and slow" when you decide to use tongue so that you don't startle or overwhelm your partner. To transition from a close-lipped kiss to one with tongue, gently stick out your tongue and use it to spread your partner's lips apart, gliding it inside their mouth until your tongues mingle.
Give neck kisses. Kissing doesn't always have to be mouth to mouth. One way to turn your partner on during a make-out session is to surprise them by pulling away for a moment to kiss their neck. If you're concerned it will feel abrupt, just remember to wait for a moment that feels like an appropriate time to switch things up, like when you naturally pull back from their mouth to catch your breath. When the time feels right, gently glide your mouth away from their lips, tilt your head slightly, and plant sexy, slow, sweet kisses up and down their neck. Keep in mind that if your partner is ticklish, this move could result in a giggle fit (which can be fun and silly, and doesn't mean you've ruined the moment).