What Your Favorite John Hughes Character Says About You

Thirty years ago this week, five strangers with nothing in common were stuck in Saturday detention. Stereotypes were reinforced, then questioned, and ultimately broken down. The rest is cinematic history. Now, The Breakfast Club, quite arguably the best teen movie of all time, is getting a limited re-release in theaters on March 26 and 31.

To celebrate this major anniversary, we decided to take a closer look at some of John Hughes' most famous fictional teens — from Claire Standish and Ferris Bueller to John Bender and Andie Walsh — and do a little stereotyping ourselves. Whether you fancy yourself a brain, a beauty, a jock, a rebel, or a recluse, we're here to wildly speculate about what your favorite character might reveal about you.

Illustrated by Mallory Heyer.
Claire Standish, The Breakfast Club
You're the kind of person who updates your Instagram several times an hour. You've given more than one of your friends a head-to-toe makeover using nothing but the items in your purse. You were the most popular girl in your cabin at camp — so popular! — and not just because you could apply lipstick with your cleavage.
Illustrated by Mallory Heyer.
Ferris Bueller, Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Your parents told you that you were a gifted child. Repeatedly. You spend an insane amount of time talking to yourself...mostly about yourself. You don't condone any -ism. You've always had this way of completely getting away with anything, which your friends think is seriously cool, but it really, really bugs some people — like your poor siblings.
Illustrated by Mallory Heyer.
Farmer Ted, Sixteen Candles
You think that asking to borrow someone's underpants is a totally reasonable request. You're Facebook friends with everyone from high school, just to show them how much cooler you are now — and you still wince when anyone calls you by your old nickname. Maybe that's because there's a little tiny part of you that will always feel like the king of the dipshits.
Illustrated by Mallory Heyer.
Susan Watts, Some Kind Of Wonderful
You're beautiful and interesting, and your effortlessly cool style is the envy of all of your friends. (Fingerless gloves? A bleached crop? You can even make a chauffeur uniform look good.) You are very, very good at playing the drums. You keep your romantic feelings — and your first name — completely to yourself, to a point.
Illustrated by Mallory Heyer.
Duckie Dale, Pretty In Pink
You have very strong lips. You are never more than 30 feet from your bicycle. You appreciate the sartorial value of a crazy pattern and you believe that the bolo tie will eventually have a comeback. You live to like your best friend. You also realize that, in the end, you have to let her go, even if it means she winds up with a major appliance like Blane.
Illustrated by Mallory Heyer.
John Bender, The Breakfast Club
You are a total badass who has no respect for authority figures. (They can eat your shorts.) You could care less about trigonometry. You spent most of your adolescence in detention, wearing the same flannel shirt day after day. You intimidate people with your strange talents (check you out lighting a match with your teeth), but you're actually a huge softy underneath it all.
Illustrated by Mallory Heyer.
Jake Ryan, Sixteen Candles
You understand that it takes a real man to rock a sweater vest. And, that there's a super-fine line between being a gorgeous jock dreamboat and an obnoxious bro. You have impeccable phone manners. You might have dated one of the worst people on the entire planet, but we won't hold it against you, because you gave Sam a birthday cake.
Illustrated by Mallory Heyer.
Allison Reynolds, The Breakfast Club
People are always telling you to smile more. You can't stop biting your nails. You love vodka, sex, and black eyeliner. You claim that your home life is unsatisfying, but that might be a total lie. (You fudge the truth a lot.) And, while you might be known for your over-the-top eccentricity, you are secretly only a headband away from being just like everyone else.
Illustrated by Mallory Heyer.
Andie Walsh, Pretty In Pink
You couldn't care less about what other people think about you or your deconstructed prom dress. You have a thing for preppy types, but for some reason, it's the interesting weirdos who are always drawn to you. You have abandonment issues, which is why you think it's normal that you spend most of your free time hanging out with a delightfully crazy woman who's twice your age and loves wigs.