8 Things You Need To Know This AM

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Jim Webb officially dropped out of the Democratic primary race, he wanted to have more time to berate kids about their weak handshakes (you just know he
’s that guy).

Clear frontrunner and heartthrob Jim Webb announced that he will end his run for the Democratic presidential nomination, leaving the nation bereft and unmoored like ships during a storm. (Wait, is that not right?) This isn’t exactly the end of Webb’s White House dreams — the erstwhile Republican has hinted that he may seek an independent bid. “Our political process is jammed up,” Webb told a news conference. “It needs an honest broker.” (USA Today)
Netflix may revive Gilmore Girls for a limited-series run, proving that where Netflix leads, we will follow, anywhere that it tells us to.

Following the popularity and success of its Wet Hot American Summer and Arrested Development revivals (well, one was more successful than the other), Netflix has its eyes on another cultural touchstone of the early aughts, which created a whole generation of fast-talking, reference-dropping women. According to industry rumors, Netflix is in meetings with Amy Sherman-Palladino, Alexis Bledel, and Lauren Graham in order to hammer out a deal to bring back Gilmore Girls. Instead of a full series, Rory and Lorelei’s new adventures would take place over four 90-minute movies. All the better to binge-watch and snack along with. (Variety)
The American Cancer Society issued new mammogram guidelines.

Contrary to everything you learned in your high school health class, you might not have to be quite so vigilant about scheduling breast cancer screenings — at least not at the moment. In a bit of a policy shift, the American Cancer Society released new recommendations for breast cancer prevention, pushing back the age for women to start getting mammograms by five years. According to the new guidelines, at the age of 45, women should have one mammogram performed a year until they reach 54, by which time they can scale back to having the test done every other year. Clinical breast exams, during which a medical professional searches for breast lumps with their hands, are no longer suggested unless you have prior signs of breast abnormality. (New York Times)
Texas cut all Medicaid funding to Planned Parenthood clinics, meaning that some Texas women won’t be able to follow the new or the old mammogram guidelines.

The assault on women’s reproductive healthcare is unceasing. At this point, when it comes to where you can get your next pap smear, no news is good news. Unfortunately, we have news: Texas health officials have decided to withdraw all Medicaid funding to the state’s Planned Parenthood clinics, all thanks to those dumb, incredibly manipulated, faker than the plants in a dentist’s office “undercover videos.” Texas cut the organization from its Medicaid program because it claims the clinics are “no longer capable of performing medical services in a personally competent, safe, legal and ethical manner.” That's funny since denying STI tests, cancer screenings, and reproductive healthcare to low-income women is much more incompetent, unsafe, and unethical than anything Planned Parenthood will ever do. (CNN)
Justin Bieber addressed his dad’s weird tweet about those vacation nudes, and we won’t stop reporting on Bieber’s dick pics until we are dead and buried.

While the internet thought it was a little bizarre, to say the least, that father Jeremy Bieber joked on Twitter about the size of his son’s "What Do You Mean," lil’ Biebz (except not that lil’, amirite?) found the “#proud daddy” quip hilarious. “It’s such a dad thing to say,” the singer admitted on the Zach Sang & The Gang radio show. “When I found out people were hating on him for saying that, I was like, ‘Are you kidding me? What dad wouldn’t be proud of that?’ I’m 21 years old, you know what I mean?” (People)
Investigators suspect arson after six predominantly Black churches around St. Louis suffer fire damage in 10 days.

It cannot simply be a coincidence that in the past 10 days, six different Black churches in the St. Louis area, mere miles from Ferguson, have experienced fires, and authorities from the St. Louis Police and Fire Departments and the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms agree. In a joint statement, investigators revealed that they believe “this fire-setting activity is meant to send a message.” In all six of the incidents, whoever set the fire waited for the churches to be empty, and then lit the external doors. (The Guardian)
Opening night tickets for the new Star Wars film are going for hundreds of dollars on eBay.

If you didn’t manage to snag yourself a ticket to the opening night of Star Wars: The Force Awakens, you’re pretty much out of luck, unless you have hundreds of dollars laying around, waiting to be spent. Now that the Fandango dust has settled, scalpers are peeking their little heads up out of their musty stub-lined dungeons in which they reside, and selling screening tickets on eBay for an exorbitant upcharge, as they are wont to do. Scalped Star Wars tickets are being peddled from $120 to $500, with one ambitious salesman offering four seats at the December 17th premiere in Los Angeles for $10,000. TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS. That’s like 700 toy lightsabers! (Vulture)
Ohio delayed all scheduled executions until 2017, due to the difficulty of obtaining the right lethal injection drugs.

In the face of a drug shortage, Ohio has delayed the executions of nearly a dozen death row inmates in order to more throughly prepare proper lethal injections. With certain drugs being discontinued and others restricted due to new distribution regulations, the 31 states that perform lethal injections are finding it harder to obtain the legally mandated execution drugs. Just last week, Oklahoma was forced to postpone the execution of inmate Richard Gossip, who is believed to be innocent, because prison officials had been sent the wrong drug. (Buzzfeed)


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