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8 Things You Need To Know This AM — Sep 18 2015

Photo: Rex / Rex USA.
The Burkina Faso military staged a coup, seizing power right before national elections.

In a broadcast aired over national television and radio, the Burkina Faso presidential guard announced the immediate dissolution of the country’s transitional government, sparking protests throughout Ouagadougou, the capital city. General Gilbert Diendere, the man believed to be behind the coup, has been installed as the new head of state. The military officers claim they will free the detained former leaders and move forward with organizing elections. (The Guardian)
Someone made a Secret Service code-name generator. Ours is "Cofagrigus." Really. Maybe the best part of the Republican debate this week was watching the candidates pick their own Secret Service code names. (Rand Paul thinks the agents who protect future President Paul should call him "Justice Never Sleeps.") Because the internet never disappoints, you can now generate your own. TBH, we were hoping for something with "laser" or "eagle." (Washington Post)
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T.I. no longer talks to his former protégée Iggy Azalea. Don’t worry, Iggy Iggs: It’s nothing that continuously blasting “Problem” can’t fix. Evidently unable to handle all the hateration and holleration in the dancery, T.I. ended his professional relationship with I-G-G-Y Azalea. During an appearance on Hot 97’s Ebro In The Morning, the rapper spoke about how Azalea’s constant bickering and feuding with other musicians put their partnership at “a bit of a rest stop.” But T.I. still sang the praises of his Aussie mentee, saying, “they [the world of Iggy Azalea] just needed a little more time to adjust...They have the talent, they have the charisma.” (Spin)
A Texas fast food employee has been fired for refusing to serve two police officers, nation is appalled because #BlueBurgersMatter.

Things got heated at a Texas Whataburger, and it’s not because anyone ordered the new Sweet & Spicy Bacon Burger (please send all free burgers to the Refinery offices, thanks): an employee was fired for denying two uniformed police officers service. Whataburger has apologized for the incident in a statement, sharing how they’ve “proudly served first responders across [their] system for decades.” (Time)
The head of a British intelligence agency wants social network sites to help him spy on their users. Geez, some people are just so desperate for followers. In an interview with the BBC, Andrew Parker, the head of MI5, condemned tech companies like Facebook and Twitter for not facilitating the country’s anti-terrorism efforts. Parker believes that the onus is on these hubs of public communication to monitor for potential threats and share intelligence with government agencies. According to him, surveillance is an “ethical responsibility.” (The Telegraph)
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Socialite brothers Harry and Peter Brant created a unisex makeup line for MAC, which means we’re all one step closer to being as beautiful as these angel-faced boys. Brothers-about-town, fashion icons, and impossibly gorgeous humans Peter and Harry Brant have deigned to share a whit of their perfection with the rest of us open-pored and oily-nosed plebeians by launching a MAC makeup collection. The unisex line is a hand-picked selection of the Brants’ beauty essentials, but the brothers have hinted that a larger project with the company is in the works. (Refinery29)
A Jeopardy! contestant got Alex Trebek to say “Turd Ferguson because she is the hero Gotham deserves. Time really is a flat circle: a 16-year-old Saturday Night Live sketch has become reality, all thanks to a Jeopardy! contestant who used the final moments of the game to make one epic joke. Unable to name an Oscar-nominated song “from a 1999 animated film about censorship,” Talia Lavin instead wrote “what is the love ballad of Turd Ferguson,” a nod to the fake name Norm Macdonald’s Burt Reynolds used during the beloved Celebrity Jeopardy! parodies. Getting Trebek to utter those words is something far greater than anything that nerd Ken Jennings accomplished. (USA Today)
Amazon will offer its new $50 tablet in a six-pack, which really is our preferred method of packaging anything: gadgets, alcohol, abdominal muscles...

Amazon is producing a new line of $50 tablets, underselling even the most inexpensive Kindle currently on the market. The 7-inch Amazon Fire isn’t HD and doesn’t exactly pose a threat to either the iPad or Galaxy Tab, but it does boast some fairly impressive specs for a gadget boasting its price tag, including 8 gigs of storage and a 1024 x 600 pixel resolution. If you didn’t already note the tablet’s aggressively cheap price, Amazon will force you to acknowledge it by selling the Fire in six-packs, as if these are Smirnoff Ices you bought in a dusty bodega, not lil’ mini computers. (The Verge)

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