Thankfully, there are some people, like Twitter user Mark Dempsey, who know how to have a little fun. Last November, Dempsey created the Twitter account Correct Names, which he uses to tweet out photos of everyday objects. Instead of using the items' dictionary-approved names, the British funnyman puts his own twist on their titles, and the end result keeps his 46.4k online followers rolling. For example, why would anyone say "butter" when they could say "bread moisturizer?"
Since starting the account about nine months ago, Dempsey's tweeted over 150 different photos of everything from a glass of water and a bathtub to a trumpet and a lawnmower, all with names that are somehow simultaneously ridiculous and totally logical. Recently, BuzzFeed caught onto the craze and gave the attention Correct Names deserves. Now, we too, are obsessed.
Here are just some of his side-splitting creations:
Though dark, this one really puts into context why Frosty wasn't allowed inside.
It's no wonder kids grow up wanting to work in construction.
Step aside, white picket fences. Wood waffles are having a moment.
Soft human storage can be yours for just thousands of dollars.
We'll honestly never look at Cheerios the same way again. Also, excuse us while we try to plant a bagel tree.
"Horse tornado" is so much more metal than "carousel."
Though they be little, they are scary AF.
Let's be real: Plain white bread loaves are worthless if they're not toasted.
If you've ever encountered a wasp, you know this description is 100% true.