The stars of Bravo go through trials and tribulations, just like us. And while most of their personal lives are aired on their respective series, we don't always get an in-depth look at how they deal with the heavier things in life that they do not want the cameras to capture. This is true for Million Dollar Listing New York star Fredrik Eklund, who spoke to Us Weekly about his experience with using a surrogate for himself and his husband Derek Kaplan to start their family. He reveals how their surrogate experienced a heartbreaking miscarriage in 2015, halting the couple's plan, and making both they and their surrogate take time to grieve over the unexpected situation.
"We’re on our way now," the real estate broker told the site at the premiere of season 6 of MDLNY. "But I can’t say anything else. We are on our way. Things are changing now. I feel good."
Eklund and Kaplan married in 2013, and were expecting with a surrogate in 2015 when the miscarriage happened. Of the difficult time, Eklund smartly acknowledges their unique situation where, as two men, neither will ever have to personally experience the physical and emotional changes that come with carrying a child. But still, this matter did not take away from the fact that the couple was ready for their twins, and still are ready for kids now. (As fans of the show know, he has long been on the journey towards having a daughter named Milla.)
"I'm also trying to be respectful that we are two guys trying to have a baby and when we've been sad and we've had our thing, we haven't even had anything happen to our bodies,” he explained to Us. "So I am very respectful of that side of it which is a little unknown to me and what our surrogates have gone through."
Eklund's emotions were best expressed in a lengthy and heartbreaking Instagram post after the miscarriage. "I'm sad to share we've had a failed pregnancy. I have cried so much that I can't cry anymore," he wrote alongside a picture of him and his husband. "We were pregnant with twins but we're not anymore. I chose to share this here, because I made this quest for Milla (and hopefully her sibling) public a long time ago."
From there, he goes on to share a sentiment that many who have experienced a miscarriage or have a loved one who has can relate to. "Every day I meet people congratulating me and Derek on the baby news, I get baby clothes sent to the office by kind strangers, and it seems that more people are invested in our little family than I could ever imagine. Our family is no different from yours... we just want to build our own unit of love in our own home. The last couple of days I couldn't take it anymore, to upkeep this perception of happiness and success when I've been a total sad mess inside."
He ends the emotional post by promising: "And we will try again. We have to. I'm not giving up. We're just not going to give up! We have to go on and simply try again." And it sounds like he is doing just that.