There are only two things I'm willing to place bets on: When my roommates will finally do their dishes and who will win The Bachelorette. That's the fun part of the show! It's like the Kentucky Derby, only instead of horses there are corn-fed men in V-necks. Every year, I comb through the contestants on the show and make a highly calculated prediction as to who will win. Usually, I'm right. According to the Bachelorette herself, though, this year the betting will be difficult.
"You hear that? You won't be able to tell," host Michael Strahan responded. Lindsay has already revealed that she is currently engaged. Now, it's just a matter of determining to whom she's promised herself.
As far as Bachelorettes go, Rachel Lindsay has been somewhat inscrutable. She's repeatedly claimed that she does not have a physical type, so it's difficult to tell what men she might like. (Previously, Lindsay dated Wisconsin native Nick Viall on The Bachelorette. Let us hope her proclivities don't lean in his very basic direction.)
Lindsay's crop of suitors certainly run the gamut. Of the 31 contestants vying for her heart, 14 of them are people of color. There's Mohit, who enjoys Bollywood dance in his spare time, and there's Lucas, who lists his profession as "whaboom." And, as GMA host Lara Spencer points out, there's Frederic, who once reported to Rachel Lindsay at summer camp.
"One of the Bachelors is a blast from the past!" Spencer said by way of introduction. "She was his camp counselor!"
The show then played a clip of Lindsay meeting Frederic in tonight's premiere.
"I cannot believe that Fred is here. I knew exactly who he was when he came out of the limo," Lindsay says in a confessional. "He was a very bad kid."
This would seem to indicate that Fred is off the table. He's a bad kid — and "not in a sexy way," as Lindsay herself puts it. The Dallas native was in third grade with Lindsay was in eighth grade, which puts a five-year gap between the two of them. Still, though, if Lindsay's promise is true, then Fred might just be the winner of this season. She said we won't be able to tell! It could be anyone! Including "whaboom"!
Just kidding, it's absolutely not Lucas "Whaboom." That I can say for sure. (I have my money elsewhere.)
Watch the full clip of Lindsay on Good Morning America, below.
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