John Mayer Tweeted His Drafts And They Don't Make Him Any Less Confusing

Photo: Ben Gabbe/Getty Images.
Just like the rest of us, John Mayer is guilty of having embarrassing Twitter drafts. Unlike the rest of us, however, Mayer's brain exists in a very John-Mayer-like liminal space between philosophical and absolutely nonsensical. I mean, he's basically spent his entire life giving one shocking quote after another, so if we're aware of the kinds of things he's chosen to say, can you imagine the things he's chosen not to?
Well, actually, you don't have to. On Tuesday, the singer, who has a new album called The Search for Everything, decided to come clean and tweet a bunch of things that were gathering dust in his Twitter drafts folder. That just means he had typed out a tweet but ultimately never hit publish, instead sending it to Twitter limbo only for it to resurface however many months later alongside his own commentary.
To be fair, some of the drafts aren't that bad. Mostly, they're the kinds of thoughts you have in the shower or while absent-mindedly walking down the street. Normally, we'd share those thoughts with a friend or significant other, but since Mayer is clear that he's single and ready to mingle, Twitter is bearing the brunt of his most confusing non sequiturs.
Ahead are a collection of John Mayer's latest Twitter drafts. I'm sorry.