How Do You Know When You've Found Your "Twin Flame"?

Photographed by Alexandra Gavillet.
Around Valentine's Day, the pressure to pair off can feel enormous. Even in 2017, this Hallmark holiday can dig up old insecurities about finding the perfect person for you — your so-called "soulmate." We probably don't have to tell you that that pressure is based on antiquated notions of fulfillment, but we would like to point out that other types of relationships can be just as meaningful as the more idealized romantic ones.

More specifically, you might not have a soulmate, but there's a chance that you do have a twin flame: someone you're close to, who inspires you, and who feels like home.

The concept of twin flames is slightly more esoteric than the idea of soulmates, but still relates to the idea that the most essential part of a person is their soul. As we go through life, our soul (as seen in our personality, preferences, and more) changes and develops, but it's always missing something. The belief is that our soul has another part to it, and that part dwells inside someone else — your twin flame.

Twin flames are mentioned in occult practices, astrology, and the very complicated world of soul science (which applies scientific thought to spirituality). But we can boil twin flames down to something pretty simple.

Like a soulmate, you only have one twin flame — and yes, this person may very well be your romantic partner. But, more important than romance, or the lack thereof, is how this person makes you feel. Your twin flame should make you feel incredibly comfortable, yet stimulated and inspired at the same time. You two can talk about anything, but you don't need to be in touch constantly. Your relationship is probably very therapeutic but, at times, challenging.

You may notice that there are a lot of contradictions at play within a twin flame pairing. That can be confusing, but it's also one way that this relationship will set itself apart from other partnerships in your life (which, for the record, are still very important and complex).

If you don't think you've met anyone who fits this description, don't panic. It's believed that people find their twin flames later in life, once they know a little more about themselves. On the other hand, it's very possible your twin flame is right under your nose, whether it's your sibling, your childhood friend, or even your parent.

So instead of stressing over having the perfect romantic V-Day, we suggest you think about who might be the twin flame in your life, and send them a note to say you're thinking of them. Remember: It's thought that the more time you spend on this relationship, the more fulfilled you'll feel on your own, too.
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