How "Different" Is Your Kink?

Illustrated by Ly Ngo.
Whether your turn-on is the simplest vanilla or the most daring fetish you can think of, there's nothing worse than feeling ashamed of it. But now, the results of a new study suggest that even the fantasies that many consider to be "unusual" are actually pretty darn common.
The study, published recently in The Journal of Sexual Medicine, examined whether or not any particular fantasy was more or less unusual than any other. To find out, the researchers surveyed a large sample of 717 men and 799 women from Québec. The survey asked about the participants' sexual fantasies and had them describe their favorites in detail.
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Results showed that we have a remarkable variety of sexual fantasies. But, the only ones that are statistically rare are those considered "pathological" (e.g., having sex with a child). The rest are pretty darn common; the most widespread fantasies for men and women include having sex in an unusual place, taking part in fellatio/cunnilingus, and having sex with someone other than a partner. Over 60% of women reported fantasies of being dominated, while about 47% said they had fantasized about dominating their partner — none of which is surprising, considering how popular BDSM porn is. However, men were more likely to report wanting to act out these fantasies than women were.
Another recent kink-related study found that women who had read the Fifty Shades of Grey series were more likely to be in abusive relationships. And, although it was tempting to think it was the books' BDSM themes that were responsible for the link, the depiction of BDSM in Fifty Shades isn't really that accurate.
And, as the study's authors note, those who have unconventional (but not uncommon) fantasies may be more sexually satisfied than those without them. There's even an entire porn site dedicated to bringing them to life. The take-home message here: Even if your kink may seem "unusual," you are almost certainly not alone.
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