This May Be The Strangest Kate Middleton Rumor You'll Ever Read

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1katePhoto: REX USA/David Hartley/Rupert Hartley/Rex.
She's pregnant. She's not pregnant. She's too skinny. She's not skinny enough. The Queen hates her fashion sense. The Queen doesn't give a damn about her fashion sense.

You'd think that any rumor that could possibly be attached to Kate Middleton has already made the rounds, but this is a new one. The Daily Star in the U.K. is reporting that the Duchess of Cambridge has hired a "female minder" to help her avoid any embarrassing wardrobe malfunctions. Specifically, the type of upskirt moments that were just published (to much outrage) by German tabloid Bild.

"Kate will now be watched all the time," a source told the paper. "We can’t afford any more embarrassing photos like this."

Going forward, the brunette will be closely guarded as she goes into changing rooms. Presumably, the minder will also prevent any accidental bum flashes or Marilyn Monroe moments by what, hovering inappropriately?

“The poor girl was snapped topless in France while on holiday and now someone has got a photo of her bottom," the source added. "She needs more protection to spare her blushes.”

Some double-stick tape or the occasional pair of trousers would probably work just as well. Or, get Pippa involved. She seems to be pretty good at keeping eyes off her sister's bottom line. (Daily Star)