gaga_embedPhoto: REX USA/Everett Collection.
There once was a lady who believed she had everything. She had hit singles making people dance, her own breed of monsters, and a name so easily pronounceable that babies could say it. Gaga, they'd say. And, just like that, a star was born. But, she did not have everything.
You see, Lady Gaga had not blossomed into the being she knew she was deep down. The Koons suddenly became her, but what's a gazing ball without a garden to exist in? So, on the day of her 28th birthday (and opening night of her Roseland Ballroom residency) she transformed into a rose.
Beneath an inflorescence of buds, Gaga began to see life through a rose-colored veil (rose-colored glasses are so passé). Now she and her gazing ball can create a new kind of garden of Eden — one where art and pop frolic above space and time, whilst the Mother Monster poses in body stockings. Together, they will compose a new single, "R.O.S.E. (Reagan Only Slept Evenings)." Don't worry about deciphering its meaning. Her ARTPOP could mean anything!

More from News

Two weeks ago, Nick Gordon was found responsible for the 2015 death of one-time girlfriend Bobbi Kristina Brown in a wrongful death lawsuit filed by her ...
Just when we thought we couldn't handle any more Hollywood romances ending, Naomi Watts and Liev Schreiber broke up. "Over the past few months we've ...
Viola Davis wants people to rethink what it means to be a survivor of sexual assault. In a speech benefitting the Rape Foundation, the How to Get Away ...
You could spend all day critiquing the media for the lack of compelling content created by and starring women. But why not put the kind of female-centric...
We've been waiting for this news ever since President Obama announced that the White House would host South by South Lawn. The official lineup is here, ...
Dusty Rose Levine 9/21/16 A photo posted by Adam Levine (@adamlevine) on Sep 23, 2016 at 9:40pm PDT Adam Levine and Behati Prinsloo Levine have ...
Update: Marion Cotillard's longtime partner, Guillaume Canet, has also weighed in on the Pitt-Jolie divorce rumors. In a post on Instagram, he wrote a long...
Fact: When a woman turns 30, she can do whatever the fuck she wants. To be sure, a woman can do just about anything just about anytime she wants. The ...
Last month, Star Wars star Daisy Ridley abruptly quit Instagram. The internet assumed that online bullying spurred her departure, because, well, the ...
Kylie Jenner has been summoned for questioning in a lawsuit against Tyga, TMZ reports. Before October 6, Jenner will appear for examination in a case ...
Pharrell Williams, the man responsible for "Happy," the song that would not go away, is expecting another child with his wife, Helen Lasichanh, E! Online...
Think about your nineteenth birthday. Perhaps it was not as special as your eighteenth birthday, but still a good birthday. You're an adult. Maybe you're...
Brad Pitt has added a well-known Beverly Hills attorney to take his side in one of the biggest Hollywood splits of our time. Pitt will be represented ...
Birth of a Nation star Gabrielle Union defended her director, Nate Parker, at the movie's premiere. To say that controversy has dogged the director and...