Good News: Your Bad Sex Life Is Ikea's Fault

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Turns out, your lackluster sex life has nothing to do with you at all. In fact, it is all your darn Ikea furniture that is keeping your lovin' sub-par. U.K. television personality Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen recently remarked that Ikea furniture is truly unsexy, and then wondered how anyone could possibly have sex in an Ikea-furnished bedroom?
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Now, R29 certainly doesn't begrudge anyone who uses the economic Swedish mega-brand for a quick aesthetic fix (as we all do), but Llewelyn-Bowen brings up an interesting point: All of Ikea's goods come flat-packed. As most modern apartment dwellers can attest, this means it comes in pieces and needs to be put together. Without getting graphic, this simple construction means all our self-assembled furniture will certainly get its rattle on.
Secondly, those of us who prefer Ikea are probably budget-conscious, which means we might rent a place in a building...with thin walls...and other people. The idea of getting freaky on a squeaky bed above neighbors isn't exactly libido-enticing, but such is the modern dilemma. Maybe it might be better to take your boot-knocking to the floor?
Llewelyn-Bowen's contention that sex should be an "opera...drama...black velvet and silk" might be a little much. It's physical intimacy, not a Phantom Of The Opera retelling, and for the most part, our birch-tinted Malm is doing just fine. (Daily Telegraph)
Photo: Courtesy of Ikea
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